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# Full text of "[HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE ED.11TH](https://archive.org/details/dli.bengal.10689.22160)"

## [See other formats](https://archive.org/details/dli.bengal.10689.22160)

```
HOW TO

WIN .FRIENDS AND
INFLUENCE PEOPLE^

a

GREAT

PvJUia Speaking ds Infiueneing
f Men in ^ueineas

jay Dale Carnegie . ^ * Ife. 3-6

Think and Ridi
hy Napdtea^iH . Rs. 2-8

*How to Seli TWir‘0^ through Li*”.

_ IjF Napoleon, ■ R*. 2-8

j Achievement

%r jflerl>ei1; N. Cs>sson Re. 1-4

Winning Personality
The “ Magic Key " to Success

by F. Oss Re. 1-4

The. Art of Practical Thinking
by Richard Weil, Jr. Rs.-^-8

How to Develop a Good Memory
by Robert H. Nutt Rt, 2-8

How to Win Friends

&

4

Influenee People

DALE CARNEGIE

B.C.8., F.K.a.S., UtLD.

.J

President of the Dale Carnegie Institute
of Effective Speaking and Human Relations,
50 East 42nd St,, New York City

Author of

PUBLIC SPEAKING
AND INFLUENCING MEN
IN BUSINESS

LINCOLN THE UNKNOWN

LITTLE KNOWN FACTS ABOUT
VyELL KNOWN PEOPLE

FIVE MINUTE BIOGRAPHIES

ELE VENTH INDIAN EDI TION

\

BOMBAY

D. B; TARAPOREVALA sons & CO.

V

Treasure Hqase of Boohs, *’ 210. Hornby Road,

l$43

INDIAN EDITIONS

EomoN

Dates

QuANTinES

I.

March, 1939.

3,0tlb copies

2.

Augiut, '' 1939

3.000 ,.

’ 3.

April, 1940

3.000

4.

October,

3.000

5.

January, IWI

6.000 „

6.

May, 1941

1,500 „

7.

8.

Sej^cmher, 1941
‘Mwch, 1942

6.000 ,.
3.000 ..

9.

Apra, 1942

8.000 ..

10.

March, 1943

3.500 ..

Offer 15 , 00,000 Copk*' of the American Editiok of this Book
haoe been sold upto February, 1942 as shoton below :—

Edition

Dates

Quantiites

!.

October, 1936

3.000 copies

2.

November, 1936

3.000 ,.

3.

November 1936

4.0C0 ..

4.

November, 1936

5.000 .,

5.

Deconb^, 1936

5,000 ..

6.

December, 1936

20,000 .,

7.

January, 1937

25,000 „

8. '

January, 1937

25,000 „

9.

January, 1937

27,000

10.

February, 1937

25.000

11.

February, 1937

25.000 ,.

12.

February, 1937

35,000

13.

February, 1937

25,000 ..

14.

February, 1937

28.000 ..

15.

March, 1937

25.000 ..

16.

March, 1937

25.000

17.

April, 1937

25.000 ,.

18.

April, 1937

28.000 ..

19.

April, 1937

25.000 ..

20.

April, 1937

25.000 ..

21.

M«y, 1937

25.000 ..

22.

June, 1937

25.000 ..

23.

August, 1937

50.000 ..

24.

August, 1937

25.(X)0

25.

September, 1937

25,000 „

26.

October, 1937

50.000 ..

27.

November, 1937

50.000 ..

28.

November, 1937

50.000 ..

29.

December, 1937

50,000

30.

January, 1938

25.QC« ..

31.

February, 1938

25,000 „

32.

March, 1938

25.000

Further coines sold upto February, 1942 over

6,M.OOO ..

(

TOTAL

15,00.000 „

PidJished by Hirji Tart^eoaia for Metm. D. B. Taraporeoala Sqm & Co, attd

Mtuason, BonAaii‘ ^

ri THINGS THIS .B 9 OK WILL bo

FOR y 6 xj

1. GetVpu out of a mental ruU fi^ve you new tKoughts.

new visions, new Vimbitions.

2. Enable you to make friends quickly and easily.

3. Increase your popularity.

4. Help yofi to win people to your way of thinking.

5. Increase your influence, ypur prestige, your

ability to get things done.

6. Enable you to win new clients, new customers.

7. Increase yqur earning power.

8. Make you a better salesman, a better executive..

9. Help you to handle complaints, avoid arguments,

keep your human contacts smooth and pleasant.

10. Make you a better spd^ker. a more entertaiinng
. conversationalist.

I

11. Make the principles of psychology easy for*
" you to apply in your daily contacts.

12. Help you to arouse enthusiasm*^ among your

i^ociates.

This Book Dedicated to j Man^
Who Doesn't Need to Read It .■*—

MY CHERISHED FRIEND

HOMER CROY

CONTENTS *

PAGS

4 »

Introduction : “ A Short-Cut- to Disiinction," by Lowdl

Thomas .. .. .. .. •• I

Preface ; “ Hovo This Book iVas Written—md Why,” by Dale

Camegie.15

PART ONE

Fundamental Techniques in Handling

People

Chapter I If You Want to Gather Honey, Don't Kick
I Over the Beehive ” .. .. .. ..25

Chapter 2 : The Big Secret of Dealing Uiith People f .. .. 37

Chapier 3 :” He Who Can Do this Has the Whole World

with Him. He Who Cannot Wtdks a Lonely
Way” .49

Nine Suggestions on How to Get the Most Out of This
Book .. . .. 66

PART TWO

Six Ways to Make People Like You

m*

Chapter Do Thb and Youll Be Welcome Anywhere • • 75
Chapter 2 ; A Simple Way to Make a Good Firsl Impresabm 88

V • *

VI

CONTENTS

PAGE

Chapter 3 : If You Dant Do' Tim, You Ate Headed

• ' • for Trouble .*96

Chaft^, 4: An Easy Way to Become a Good Convenor '

tioncdiit .. '.* .. 104

^ #

Chapter 5 •. Hou> So iMerest People .. ' .. ..113

Chapter 6 : How to Makp People Ltkt You Instantly. .. 119
In a Nutshell.. . 133

PART THREE

ip

Twelve Ways to Win People to Your
' Way of Thinking

Chapter I: You Can't Win an Argument . .137

Chapter 2: A Sure Way of Making Enemies—and How to

Avoid It., .. .. .. .. .. 144

Chapter 3: If You're Wrong, Admit It .156

Chapter 4: The High Road to a Man’s Reason .. .. 163

Chapter 5; The Secret of Socrates .174

CfUFTER 6: The Safety Valve in Handling Complairits 180

Chapter 7 : How to Get Co-operation .. '.186

Chapter 8: A .Formula That Will Worl^ Wonders for

Vou .. 193^

Chapter 9: What Everybody Wants .^ '..197

Chapter 10: An Appeal That Everybody Likps .. • • 204

Chapter 11 ; The Movies Do It. Radio Does It. Why Dont

You Do It? .. .. •• *. -- 210

Chapter 12: When Nothing Else Workt> Try This .. ^.. <214

In A Nutshell.* ..218

CONTENTS'

VII

PART FOUR

• ''

Nine Ways to ‘Change People Without
Giving Offense *or Arousing Resei9tment

PAGE

ChapteS 1 : If *You Must Find Fault This is the Way to

Begin . 221

%

Chapter 2; How to Criticize—xmd Not Be Hated for It . . 227

Chapter 3 : T(dk About Your Own Mistakes First 229

Chapter 4 : No One Likes to Tak Orders . 233

%

Chapter Let the OFwr Man Save His Face .. <..234

Chapter 6 : How to Spur Men on to Success . 237

Chapter Give the Dog a Good Name * . 242

Chapter 8 : Make the Fault Seem Easy to Correct 246

Chapter Making People Clad to Do What Vou,

Want .. ^249

y

In a Nutshell.253

PART FIVE

Letters That Produced Miraculous Results 257

PART »six

Seven Rules for Making Your Home

Life Happier .

\

Chapteb* I : How to Dig Your Marital Grave in the Qfdckest
* Possikle l^ay .. .. .. 269

Chapter 1 : Love a^ Let Live .276

CONXENTS

VIU

PAGE

e

"Chapter 3: Do This and Yo&Il Be Looking Up the
» * ' Time-Tables to Reno .. «279

, « n*

ChaftIr . 4i a Quick to Make Everybody Happy . . 284
Chapter 5 ; They Meafj soMuch to a H^oman .. .. 287

Chapter 6: If You Want to Be Happy^ Dont Negfeet

This One .. •. . 290

•

Chapter 7: Don't Be a Marriage Illiterate " * .. .. -294

In a Nutshell.299

Diary .305

Index .. .* ..309

f^lO« Bv*!!.'. li-jjt.'- •'.(Vi'k'i.i

A SHORT-CUT J6 DISTINCTION

BY Lowell Thomas

O N a cold, winter night last January, two thou¬
sand five hundred men and women thronged into
the grand*ballroom of the Hotel Pennsylvania in New
York. E^ery Av^iilahle seat was filled by lulf past seven.
At eight o’clock, the eager crowd was still pouring in.
The spacious balcony was so5n janfmed; presently even
standing space was at a premium and hundreds of
people, tir^ after navigating a day in businessf stood
up for an hour and a half that night to witness—What?

A fashion show?

A six-day bicycle race or a personal appearance of
Clark Gable ?

No. These people had been lured there by a news¬
paper ad. Two evraings preriously, they had picked up
a copy of* the New York Sun and found a full-page
announcement staring them in the face.

** Increase Your Income
Learn to Speak Effectively ~

Prepare for Leadership”

Old stufi? Yes, but believe it or not, in the most
sophisticated town on earth, during a depression with
twenty per ceht of the population on relief, Iwenty-five
hyndVed p<^ple left their homes and hustled to the
Pennsylvania Hotefin res^nse to thiatlad.

2

A SHORX-CUT

And'the ad appeared—remember this—no^ in a tab-
| 9 id sheet, but in' the most conservative evening paper
in town—the New York Sm; and the people who re¬
sponded were of the upper econoaiic strata—executives,
employers, and professional men with incomes ranging
from two thousand to fifty thousand a year.

These men and women had come to hear the opening
of an ultra-modem, ultra-practical course in
‘Effective Spiking and Influencing Men in Business”
—a course given by the Dale Carnegie Institute of
Effective Speaking and Human Relations.

Why were they there, these two thousfuid five
himdreo business men and women r

Because of a sudden hunger for more education due
to the depression ?

Apparently rot, for this same course had been play¬
ing to packed houses in New York City every season for
the past twenty-four years. During that time, more than
fifteen thousand business and professional men had
been trained by Dale Carnegie. Even large, skeptical,
conservative organizations such as the Westinghouse
Electric & Manufacturing Company, McGraw-Hill
Publishing Company, Brooklyn Union Gas Company,
Brooklyn Chamber of Commerce, American Institute
of Electrical Engineers, and the Nev; York Telephone
iCo'mpany have had this training conducted in their own
offices for the benefit of their members and executives.

The fact that these men, ten or twenty years after
leaving grade school, high school, or college, come

TO DISTINCTION

MM • *

That gumy revealed that the primainterest of adults
is h ealt| ^ Italso revealedkhattheir se^d'interest is in
3(^ 3opng sldlj in human relationshW : they v^t~to
li Mira w t^hnicme of ^ttin^*along and^uinuenc-
in g omer people . 1 hey don.t wMt to become public
speakers; and they don t want to'listen to a lot of high-
sounding tail alraut psychology—they want^ sugges¬
tions that* ^hey can ^ use immediately in business, in
social contacts, and in the home.

So that was what adults wanted to study, was it?

“All right,” said the people making the survey.
“Fine. If that is what they want, we’ll give it to them.”

Looldnl' aroupd for a textbook, they discovef^ that
no working manual had ever been written to help people
solve their daily problems in human reladonsKips.

Here was a hne kettle of hsh! For hundreds of years,
learned volumes had been written on Greek and*Latin
and higher mathematics—topics about which th^ av¬
erage adult doesn'^t give t^ hoots. But on the one sub¬
ject on which he has a thirst for knowledge, a veritable
passion for guidance and help—nothing!

This explains the presence of twenty-five hundred
eager adults crowding into the grand ballroom of the
Hotel Pennsylvania in response to a nev^paper adver¬
tisement. Here, apparently, at last was the thing f^r
which they had long been seeking.

Back in high school and college, they had pored over
.books, believing^ that knowledge alone )^s the open
sesame to financial and professional/ewards.

few years in the rough-and-tumble of business
md pro^sional life had brought*sharp disillusionment.

4 A SHORTCUT

ani^n cw an4, navigate the ship of business, per>t
sonality ^ and' thB ability ^ to talk are more' important
thah ajmbwjedjpie of Latin verb^'or a sheepsldn from

Harvaro.

The advertisement in the New York San promised
that the meeting in the Hotel Pennsylvapia would be'
highly entertaining. It was. *

Eighteen men who had taken the course were mar¬
shaled in front of the loud speaker—and fifteen of them
were given precisely seventy-five seconds each to tell
his story. Only seventy-five seconds of talk, then
“bang" went the gavel, and the chairman shouted,
“Time ! Next speaker !” '

The atfair moved with the speed of a herd of buffalo
thundering across the plains. Spectators stood for an
hour and a hall to watch the performance.

T^ie speakers were a cross section of American busi-
ness'^life: a chain-store executive; a baker; the president
of a trade association; two bankers; a truck salesman;

6 chemical salesman; an insurance man; the secretary
of a brick manufacturers’ association; an accountant; a
dentist; an architect; a whiskey salesman; a Christian
Science practitioner; a druggist who had come from
Indianapolis to New York to take the course; a lawyer
^^ho had come from Havana, in order to prepare
himself to give one important three-minute speech.

The first speaker bore the Gaelic name of Patrick J.
O’Haire. BoPi in Ireland, he attended school for only,
four years, drifted to America, worked as a mechanic
then as a chauffeur. *

At forty, his family was growing up, he needed more
money; so he tried to sell automobile trucks. Suffering
from an inferiority complex that, as he Put it, was eat¬
ing his heart out, he had to walk up aha down in front
pf te office half a dozen times before he could summon
' u^^ough courage to open the door. He was so dis-

TO DISTINCTION

salesman that ^he was thinking of going
vith his hands in a mafcluhe shi^, when
ope day he received a letter inviting him t'o^ah organi¬
zation meeting of the Dale Carnegie Cour^'^fil j^ective
Speaking. , • ‘

He didn’t want to attend. "Ho feared he would have
to associate ifith a lot of college men, that he would be
out of place.

His despairing wife insisted that he go, saying, “It
may do you some good, Pat. God knows you need it."
He went down to the place where the meeting was to be
held and ^tood on the sidewalk for five minutes before
he could .generate enough self-confidence to pnter the
room. •

The first few times he tried to speak, he was dizzy
with fear. As the weeks drifted by, he lost all fear of
audiences and soon found that he loved to ta^c—the
bigger the crowd, the better. And he also lost ni% fear
of individuals. He lost his fear of his own customers.
His income mounted and skyrocketed. Today he is one
of the star salesmen in New York City. That night at
the Pennsylvania Hotel, Patrick O Haire stood in
front of two thousand five hundred people and told a
gay, rollicking story of his achievements. Wave after
wave of laughter swept over the audience. Few pro-
■fes^onal speakers could have equalled his performance.^

The next speaker, Godfrey Meyer, was a gray¬
headed banker, the father of eleven children. The first
time he attempted to speak in class, hifc^was literally
• strppk dumb. His mind refused to function. His story
is a vivid illustration of how leadership gravitates to
the map who can talk.

He w(j^~fiip,Wall Street and for twenW-five* yd^rs
he Im been living in Clifton, New Jersey. During that
time, he had taken no active part in community Mali's
and kn^ perhaps five hundred people. ' *

couraged ^ a
back to wrk

6

A SHORT-CUT

Shortly after he had enrolled in the ^mene G>urse,
he received his tSax bill and was infuriated at what he
considered unjust charges. Ordinarily, he would haye
sat at .l)pnie ^and fumed, or taken it out in grousing to
his nei^bors. But instead, he put on his hat that night,
walked into.town meeting, and blew ol^ his steam in
public. * <•

As a result of that talk of indignation, the citizens
of Clifton, New Jersey', urge4 him to run fbr the town
council. So for weeks he went from one meeting to an¬
other, denouncing waste and municipal extravagance.

There were ninety-six candidates in the field. When
the baWots were counted, lo, Godfrey Meyer ^ name led
all the rest. Almost overnight, he became a public
figure among the forty thousand people in his
community. As a result of his talks, he made eighty
times more friends in six weeks than he had been
abk t6 do previously in twenty-five years.

And his salary as councilman meant that he got a
return of one thousand per cent a year on his
investment.

The third speaker, the head of a large national
association of rood manufacturers, told how he had
be«n unable to stand up and express his ideas at
meetings of a board of directors. ,

*'As a result of learning to think on his feet, two
astonishing things happened. He* was swn made
president of his association and, in that capacity, he was
obliged to address meetings all over the United Stetes."
Excerpts from his‘talks were put on the Associated'
Press wires and prii\ted in newspapers and trade
magazines throughout the country.

'In "two years, after learning to speak, he received
more free publicity for his company and its products
than he had been able to get previously by a quarter ,of
a million dollars spent in direct'advertising. This

TO DISTINCTION

peaker i^mitted that he had formerly hesitated to
telephone some of the ippre important business exe(^-^
twes in lower Manhattan and invite them to hinch with
him. But as a result*of the prestige he had acxudred by
his talks, these same jnen now telephoned" nim and
invited him to, lunch and apologized* to him for
encroaching nn his time.

The abiljty to speak is a sho^t cut to distinction. It
puls a man in the limelight, raises him head and shoul¬
ders above the crowd. And the man who can speak ac¬
ceptably is usually given credit for an ability out of
all proportion to what he really possesses.

A moVfement,fof adult education is sweepfng over
the nation today; and the most spectacular force in
that movement is Dale Carnegie, a man who has lis¬
tened to and criticized more talks by adults than has
any other man in captivity. According to a recent car¬
toon by “Believe-It-or-Not" Ripley, he has criti^zed
150,000 speeches. If that grand total doesn’t impress
you, remember that it means one talk for almost every
day that has passed since Columbus discovered Ame¬
rica. Or, to put it in other words, if all the men who have
spoken before him had used only three minutes and had
appeared before him in succession, it would have taken
a solid year, listenipg day and night, to hear them all.

Dale Carnegie’s own career, filled with sharp con¬
trasts, is a striking*example of what a man can accom¬
plish when he is obsessed with an original idea and
ahre with enthusiasm.

• V

B8m on a Missouri farm ten miles from a railway,
he never saw a street car until he was twelve years old;
yet today, at forty-six, he is familiar with the far-flupg
corners of the earth, everywhere from Hong Kong to
Hammerfest; and, at one time, he approached closer to
the North Pole than Admiral Byrd’s headquarters at
Little America were to the South Pole.

8

A SHORTCUT

This Missouri lad who'once packed straw1;«rries and
(mt cocklehurs lor hve cents an hour is now paid a
dollar a minute for training thfe executives of large
corpK>r^ions in the art of self-e1»pression.

This erstwhile cowboy,who once punched cattle and
branded calves and rode fences put in western South
Dakota later went to Lx>ndon and put on shows under
the patronage of his Royal Highness, the Prince of
Wales.

This chap who was a total failure the first half-
dozen times that he tried to speak in public later
becanie my p)ersonal manager. Much of my success
has be6.i due to training under Da^e Gimegie.

Young Carnegie had to struggle for an education,
for hard luck was always battering away at the old
farm in northrvest Missouri with a flying tackle and a
bodyulam. Year after year, the “102” River rose and
droimed the corn and swept away the hay. Season aft^r
season, the fat hogs sickened and died from cholera,
the bottom fell out of the market for cattle and mules,
and the bank threatened to foreclose the mortgage.

Sick with discouragement, the family sold out and
bought another farm neap the State Teachers’ College
at *Warrensburg, Missouri. Board and room could be
had in town for a dollar a day; but young Carregit
couldn’t afford it. So he stayed on the farm and com¬
muted on horseback three miles to college each day. At
home, he milked the cows, cut the wood, fed the hogs, ^
and sludiedThis Latin verbs by the light of a coal-oil
lamp until his eyes blurred and he began to' nod*:^

Even when he got to bed at midnight, he set the
alanpi for three o’clock. His father bred pedigreed
Duroc-Je^ey hogs—and there was danger, during the
bitter cold nights, of the young pigs’ freezing to death;
so they were put in a basket, covered with a gunny sack,
and set behind the kitchen stove. True to their nature

9

TO DISTINCTION

the pigs d^anded a hot meal'at three A.M. So wHen the
alarm went off, Dale Carpegie crawled out of the blanr
kets, took the basket <5f pigs out to their mother, waited
for them to nurse, and* then brought theni back'to the
warmth of the kitchen stove.

There were six-hundred students in State Teachers’
College*; and Dale Carnegie was one of the isolated half
dozen who,couldn’t afford to bpard in town. He was
ashamed of the poverty that made it necessary for him
to ride back to the farm and milk the cows every night.
He was ashamed of his coat, which was too tight, and
his trouser|, which were too short. Rapidly developing
an inferiority compilex, he looked about for soncie short
cut to distinction. He soon saw that there were certain
groups in college that enjoyed influence and prestige
—^ihe football and baseball players and the chaps who
won the debating and public-speaking cfintests.

Realizing that he had no flair for athletics, he;; de¬
cided to win one>of the speaking contests. He spent
months preparing his talks. He practiced as he sat in
the saddle galloping to college and back; he practiced
his speeches as he milked the cows ; and then he
mounted a bale of hay in the bam and witfi great gusto
and gestures harangued the-frightened pigeons about
the necessity of halting Japanese immigration.

* But in spite of all his earnestness and preparation, lie
met with defeat after defeat. He was eighteen at the
time--sensitive and proud. He became so discouraged,

* so depressed that he even thought of suicide. And then
-su^d^ly he began to win, not one*contest but every
spe^ng contest in college.

Other students pleaded with him to train them; and
they won also.

Graduating from college, he started selling corre¬
spondence courses to the ranchers among the sand hills
of westefti Nebraska and eastern Wyoming.

10

A SHORT-CUT

In l^pite of all his boundless energy and enthusiasm,
he couldn’t make the grade. jHie ^canw so discouraged
that he went to his hotel room in Alliance, Nebraska,
in the j^iddie of the day, threw himself across the bed,
and wept with despair. He longed to go back to college,
he longed to retreat frofn the harsh battle of life; but
he couldn’t. So he resolved to go to Omaha and get an¬
other job. He didn’t have the money for, a railroad
ticket so he traveled ‘ on a, freight train, ‘ feeding and
watering two carloads of wild horses in return for his
passage. Landing in South Omaha, he got a job selling
bacon and soap and lard for Armour and Company.
His t^ritory was up among the j3ad Laifds and the
cow and Indian country of western Smith Dakota. He
covered his territory by freight train and on stage
coach and on horseback and slept in pioneer hotels
where the only partition between the rooms was a sheet
of muslin. He studied books on salesmanship, rode
bulking bronchos, played poker with squaw men, and
learned how to collect money. Whefi an inland store¬
keeper couldn’t pay cash for the bacon and hams he had
ordered, Dale Carneme would take a dozen pairs of
shoes o^ his shelf, sea the shoes to the railroad men,

and forward-the receipts to Armour and Company.

,1 *

He would often ride a freight train a hundr^ miles
a day. When the train stopped to unload* freighif, he
would dash uptown, see three or four merchants, get
his orders ; and when the whistle blew, he would dash
down the street again lickety-split and swing onto the
train while it was moving.

Within two years, he had taken an unproductive ter¬
ritory that stood in the twenty-fifth p\&(X and boosted
it to first place among all the twenty-tnine car routes
leading out of South Omaha. Armour and Coinpany
pfiered to promote him, sa 3 ring: “You have achieved
what seem^ impossible.’’ But he refused the promotion

TO DISTINCTION

II

and resigned—resigned, went to New York, studied at

the American Academy Dramatic*Arts, imd toure^^,

. th^ country playing the role of Dr. Hartley in Polly oj

the Circas. •• * •

*

He would never be a Booth or a Barrymore’. He bad
the good sense tQ recognize that} So back he went to
sales .work aglsin, di^nsing automobile trucks for the
Packard Motor Car Company.

He knew nothing about machinery and cared noth¬
ing about it. Dreadfully unhappy, he had to scourge
himself to his task each day. He longed to have time to
study, to vyrite the books he had dreamed about writing
back in college,. So he resigned. He was going spend
his days writing stories and novels and support himself
by teaching in a night school.

Teaching what? As he looked back an^ evaluated his
college work, he saw that his training in public. %peak-
ing had done more to give him confidence, courage,
poise, and the ability to meet and deal with people in
business than had all the rest of his college courses pu^
together. So he urged the Y. M. C. A. schools in New
York to give him a chance to conduct courses in public
speaking for business men.

What? Make orators out of business men? Absurd.

■ They knew. They, had tried such courses—and they
had always’failed. *

When they refused to pay him a salai^ of two dollars
a night, he agreed to teach on a commissjon basis and
'take a percentage of the net profits—^if there were any
pro£tfl»-to take. And inside of thred years they were
paying him thirty dollars a night on that basis—instead
of two.

The course grew* Other “Y’s” heard of it, ^hen other
cities.. Dale C^egie soon became a glorified circuit
ridsi covering New York, Philadelphia, Baltimore, and
later Lorfdon and.Paris. All the textbooks were too

12

A SHORT-CUT

a

acadeAiic and impractical for the business men who
Rocked to his cotirses. Nothmg daunted, h^ sat down
and wrote one entitled Public Speaking and Influertc-
ing Men in *Bminess. It is now the omcial text of all
the Y. M. C a: s as well as of, the American Bankers’
Association and the National Credit Men s Association.

a

Today far more adults come to Dale*Carnegie for
training in public speaking each season than go to all
the extension courses in public speaking conducted by
all the twenty-two colleges and universities located in
New York City.

Dale Carnegie claims that any man can talk when
he getVmad. He says that if you hit the most ignorant
man in town on the jaw and knock him down, he will
get on his feet and talk with an eloquence, heat, and
emphasis thejt would have rivaled William Jennings
Bryap in his palmiest days. He claims that almost
anyt man can speak acceptably in public if he has
self-conhdence and an idea that is boiling and stewing
within him.

The way to develop self-confidence, he says, is to do
the thing you fear to do and get a record of successful
experiencesJaehind you. So he forces each man to talk
at every session of the course. The audience is sympa¬
thetic. They are all in the same bofit; and, by constant
practice, they develop a courage, confidence, and en -
thusiasm that carry over into their private speaking.

Dale Carnegie will tell you that he has made a living
all these years, not by teaching public speaking—that*
has been incidentSI. He claims his main job-has^sgii t<5
help men conquer their fears and develop courage.

He started out at first to conduct merely a course in
public speaking, but the students who came were busi¬
ness men. Many of them hadn’t seen the inside of a
classroom in thirty years. Most pf them were paying
their tuition on the instalment plan. Thtfy wanted

TO DISTINCTION

13

results an4 they wanted them quick-;Tesults that they
could use the next day in business interviews and ii^.
speaking before groups. ,

So he was forced to be swift and practic^/ G)nse-
quently, he has developed a system of training that is
unique—a striking combination of public speaking,
salesihanship, human relations, and applied psychology.

A slave* to no hard and fast lules, he has developed
a course that is as real as the measles and twice as much
fun.

When the classes terminate, the men form clubs of
their own'and continue to meet fortnightly for. years
afterwards. Oftagroup of nineteen men in Philadelphia
havt been meeting twice a month during the winter sea¬
son lor seventeen years. Men frequently motor fifty or
a hundred miles to attend these classes; One student
used to commute each week from Chicago to New*York.

Piofessor William James of Harvard used to* say
that the average man develops only ten per cent of
h.s latent mental ability. Dale Carnegie, by helping
bus,ness men and women to develop their latent
possibilities, has created one of the most significant
movements in adult educatiop.

h6W this- book was WRlTtEN—

AND WHY

BY Dale ’Carnegie

During the last thirty-five years, the publishing
houses of America have printed more than a fifth of
a million different books. Most of them were deadly
dull; and many were financial failures. **Many,” did I
say? The president of one of the largest publishing
houses in the world recently confessed to* me that his
company, after seventy-five years of publishing ex^ri-
ence, still loses money on seven out of every eight books
it publishes.

Why, then, have I had the temerity to write another
hook? And, after I have written it, why should you
bother to read it?

Fair questions, both; and I'lVtry to answer them.

.In order to explain* precisely how and why this book-*
was written, I rnav, unfortunately, have to repeat
briefly some of the facts that you have already read in
Cowell Thomas* introduction entitled “A Short Cut to
Distinction.” .

I tla^;.x,^nce 1912, been conducting educational
courses for business and professional men and women
in New York. At first, 1 conducted courses in public
speaking only—courses designed to train adulhs, by ac¬
tual experience, to think on their feet and express theii;,
idrasT with jnore clarity, more eflectiveness, and more
poise, both in busings interviews and before groups.

16

HOW THIS BOOK WAS WRITTEN

But gradually^, as the seasons passed, 1 realized that
. 'Sorely as these adults needed training in effective speak¬
ing, they needed still more training in the fine ait of
getting, along with people in' everyday business and
social contacts.

/I

I also gradually realized that 1 was sorely in need of
such training myself. As I look back now across the
years, I am appalled at my ovm frequent lack of finesse
and understanding. How I wish a book such as this had
been placed in my hands twenty years ago ! What a
priceless boon it would have been !

Dealing with people is probably the biggest problem
you face, especially if you are a business man. Yes, and
that is also true if you are an accountant, house¬
wife, architect, or engineer. Investigation and research
made a few years ago under the auspices of the Car¬
negie Foundation uncovered a most important and
significant fact—^a fact later confirmed by additional
studies made at the Carnegie Institute of Technology.
These investigations revealed that even in such techni¬
cal lines as engineering, about 15 per cent of ones
financial success is due to one’s technical knowledge and
about 85 per cent is due to skill in human engineering
—to personality and the ability to lead people.

For many years, 1 conducted courses eetch season in
the Engineers’ Club of Philadelphia, and also courses
for the New York Chapter of the American Institute of
Electrical Engineers. A total of probably more thap
1,500 engineers have passed through my classes. They
came to me because they finally realized, aftef^rs of
observation and experience, that the highest-paid men
,in the engineering held are frequently not the men who
know most about engineering. One for example,
hire mere technical ability in engineering, accomitancy,
architecture, or any other profession at twenty-five to
fifty dollars a week. The market is alv/ays glutted with

17

-AND WHY

m

it. But the man who has technical knowledge plus the
ability to express his ideas, to assanfe leadership, ai^
to arouse enthusiasm among men—that man<is headed
for higher earning power. *

In the heyday of his activity, John D. Rockefeller
told Matthew Ct Brush that “the ability *to deal with
people is as* purchasable a commodity as su^ar or
coffee,” “^d I will pay more for that ability, ’ said
John D., “than for any other under the sun.”

Wouldn’t you suppose that every college in the land
would conduct courses to develop the highest-priced
ability under the sun? But if there is just one practical,
common-sensd course of that land given for adults in
even one college in the land, it has escaped my attention

up to the present writing.

The University of Chicago and the United Y.]^.C.A.
Schools conducted a survey to determine what adults
really want to study.

That survey cost $25,000 and took two years. The
last part of the survey was made in Meriden, Connecti¬
cut, It was taken as a typical American town. Every
adult in Meriden was interviewed and Irequested to
answer 156 questions—questions such as “What* is
your business or profession? Your education? How
do you spend your spare time? What is your income?
Your hobbles? Your ambitions? Your problems?
What subjects are you most Interested in studying?”
" And so on. That survey revealed that* health is the
* priwieinterest of adults—^and that their second interest
is people : how to understand and get along with
people; how to make people like you; and how to win
others to your way of thinking.

So.the committee conducting this survey resolved to
cdhduct such a course for adults in Meriden. They
searched diligently for a practical textbook on the

18

HOW THIS BOOK WAS WRITTEN

subject but found'—not one. Finally they approached
one of the world’s .outstanding authorities on adult
education, and asked him if he. knew of any book
which met the needs of this group. “No,” he replied,
“I kno\^what those adults want. But the book they
need has never been written."

»

1 knew from experience that this statentent was-true,
for I myself had been ^searching for years t© discover
a practical, working handbook on human relations.

Since no such book existed, 1 have tried to write one
for use in my own courses. And here it is. I hop; you
like it.

In preparation for this book, I read, tveryihing that
1 could find on the subject —everything from Dc rothy
Dix, the divorce-court records, and the Parent's Mcga-‘
zine, to Profersor Overstreet, Alfred Adler, and Wil¬
liam James. In addition to that, I hired a trained le-
searth man to spend one and a half years in var i-us
libraries reading everything I had -missed, plowing
through erudite tomes on psychology, poring over hun¬
dreds of magazine articles, searching through countless
biographies, trying to ascertain how the great men of
all ages had dealt with people. We read the blogre pines
of the great men of all ages. We read the life stones
of all great leaders from Julius Caesar to Thomas
Edison. I recall that we read over one hundred'
biographies of Theodore Roosevelt alone. We were
determined to spare no time, no expense, to discover
every practical idea that anyone had ever used through¬
out the ages to win friends and influence people.^

I personally interviewed scores of successful people,
some of them world-famous—^Marconi, Franklin D.
Roosevelt, Owen D. Young, Cl^ Gable, Mary Pick-
ford, Martin Johnson—^and tried to discover the tech¬
nique they used in human relations. ‘ t,

. From all this material, 1 prepared a shoft talk. I

19

-AND WHY

called it “^ow to’Win Friends and Ij^fluence People.’*

I say “short.” It was shojt in the beginning, but it hae
now expanded to a lecture that consumes onerhour a^d
thirty minutes. For yeftirs, I have given this talk each
season to the adults in the Carnegie Institute courses in
New York. , * • •

I g&ve the lalk and urged them to go out and test it
in their buginess and social contacts, and then come
back to class and speak about their experiences and the
results they had achieved. What an interesting
ment! These men and women, hungry for seit-im-
provementj were fascinated by the idea of working in a
new kind .of laboratory—^the first and only laWoialory
of human relatiofliships for adults that has ever existed.

This book wasn’t written in the usual sense of the
word. It grew as a child grows. It grew gnd developed
out of that laboratory, out of the experiengps cl'
thousands of adults. !

Years ago, we jftarted with a set of rules printed on a
card no larger than a post card. The next season we*
printed a larger card, then a leaflet, then a series of
booklets, each one expanding in size and scope. And
now, after fifteen years of experiment and research,
comes this book.

The rulas we haVfe set down here are not mere thva¬
ries or guess work. They work like magic. Incredible
as it sounds, I have seen the application of these prin-
^ciples literally revolutionize the lives of piany people.

, To illustrate: Last season a man v*ilh 314 employees
joifled one of these courses. For years, he had driven
and criticized and condemned his employees without
stint or discretion, jpndness, words of appreciaiiop,
and encouragement wire alien to his lips. After study¬
ing the principles disetssed in this book, this employer
shjfrply ahered his philosophy of life. His organization
is now inspired with a new loyalty, a new enthusiasm, a

20

HOW THIS BOOK WAS WRITTEN

new spirit of teai^ work. Three hundred aruJ fourteen
..j^emi^ have been turned into three hundred and four¬
teen friends.,, As he proudly said in a speech before the
class: “When I used to walk thrbiigh my establishment,
no one greeted me. My employees actually looked the
other way when they saw me approaching. But now
they are all my friends and even the janitdr calls me by
my first name.”

This employer now has more profit, more leisure,
and—^what is infinitely more important—^he finds far
more happiness in his business and in his home.

Countless numbers of salesmen have sharply increas¬
ed their^ales by the use of these principles. Pllany have
opened up new accounts—^accounts that they had
formerly solicited in vain. Executives have been given
increased authority, increased pay. One executive last
season reported an increase in salary of five thousand a
yea* largely because he applied these truths. Another,
an executive in the Philadelphia Gas «Works Company,
,was slated for demotion because of his belligerence,
because of his inability to lead people skillfully. This
training not only saved him from a demotion when he
was sixty-fi,ve, but it brought him promotion with
increased pay.

On innumerable occasions, w’ves attending .the

banquet given at the end of the course have told me

that their homes have been much happier since their

husbands took this training.

• %

Men are frequently astonished at the new results
they achieve. It all seems like magic. In some cases,*
in their enthusiasm, they have telephoned me at my
hom^e on Sundays because they couldn’t wait forty-
eight houfs to report their achievements at the regular
session of the course. > ' %

< i'

>One man was so stirred by a talk on these principles
last season that he sat discussing them with the other

2i

-AND WHY

members of the class until far into the night. Af three
o’clock in fhe morning, the others wetit home. But h^
was so shaken by a realization of his own mistakes
inspired by the vista of« new and richer world opening
before him, that he was unable to sleep. didn t
sleep that night or the next day or the next night.

Who was he? A naive, untrained individual ready to
gash over*apy new theory that came along? No. Far
from it. He is a sophisticated, blase dealer in art, very
n!,uch the man about town, who speaks three languages
fluently and is a graduate of two foreign universities.

While writing this chapter, I received a letter from a
German of the old School, an aristocrat whose forbears
had served for generations as professional army officers
under the Hohenzollems, His letter, written from a
transatlantic steamer, telling about the ftpplication of
these principles, rose almost to a religious fervor*

Another man, an old New Yorker, a Harvard gradu¬
ate, whose name looms large in the Social Register, a
wealthy man, the owner of a large carpet factory, de-«
dared that he had learned more in fourteen weeks
through this system of training about the fine art oi in¬
fluencing people than he had learned abotit the same
subject during his four years in college. Absurd?
Laughable^ Fantastic? Of course, you are privileged to
dismiss this statement with whatever adjective you
wish. I am merely reporting, without comment, a
declaration made by a conservative and eminently suc¬
cessful Harvard graduate in a public address to approxi-
^ately'sis^ hundred men at the Yale Club in New
York on the evening of Thursday, February 23, 1933.

“Compared to what we ought to be,” said the fanjous
Professor William James of Harvard, “compared to
what we ought to be, we are only half awake. We are
making use of only jk small part of our physical and
mental r&ources. Stating the thing broadly, the human

m

22

HOW THIS BOOK, WAS WRITTEN

indivlHual thus lives far within his limits. He possesses
powers of various sorts which,he habitually falls to use.”

'Those‘pawers which you “habitually fail to use”!
The sole purpose of this book is to help you discover,
develop, and profit by those dormant and unused assets.

“Education,” said Dr. John G. Hibben, former
President of Princeton University, “education is the
ability to meet life’s situations.” , '

If by the time you have finished reading the first
three chapters of this book—if you aren’t then a little
better equipped to meet life’s situations, then I shall
consider this book to be a total failure, so far as you are
concerrJted. For “/Ae great aim of Sucation,'^ said Her¬
bert Spencer, “is not knowledge bat action"

And this is an action book.

This introduction, like most introductions, is already
toojong. So let’s go. Let’s get down to brass tacks at
once. Please turn immediately to Chapter One.

A'a

PART I

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES
IN HANDLING PEOPLE

FUNDAMENT>5lL techniques
IN HANDLING PEOPJ-E

CHAPTER ONE

“IP YOU WANT TO GATHER
HONEY, DON’T KICK OVER
THE BEEHIVE”

O N M5y 7,* J9T], New York City witnessed the

most sensational man-hunt the old town had
ever known. After weeks of search, “Two Gun ”
Crowley—the killer, the gunman who -didn’t smoke
or drink—was at bay, trapped in his sweetheart’s
apartment on West End Avenue. *

One hundred and fifty policemen and detectives laid
siege to his top-floor hideaway. Chopping holes in the *
roof, they tried to smoke out Crowley, the “cop killer,”
with tear gas. Then they mounted their machine guns
on surrounding buildings, and for more tflan an hopr
one of New York’s fine residential sections reverberated
with^lhe crack of pistol fire and the rat-tat-tat of ma^
chine guns. Crowley, crouching behind an overstuffed
chair, fired incessaritly at the police. Ten thousand ex-
,cited people watched the battle. Nothing like it had
ever been seen before on the sidewa^cs of New York.

When Crowley was captured,. Police Commissioner
Mulrooney declared that the two-gun desperado was
one of the most dangerous criminals ever encountered
in the history of New York. “He will HH,’* said the
^mmissioner, “at the drop of a feather.”

But hotv did “Two Gun” Crowley regard himself.^

26 FUNDAMENTAL. TECHNIQUES

We know, becav^e while the police were fijdng into his
apartment, he wrote a lettei; addressed “To whom it
insy conoetlj.” And, as he wrote, the blood flowing frem
his wounds left a crimson trai^ bn the paper. In this
letter Crowley said: “Under my coat is a weary heart,
but a kind one—one that would do nobody any harm.”

A short time before this, Crowley had*been having a
necking party on a country road out on !^ng Island,
Suddenly a policeman walked up to the parked car and
said; “Let me see your license,’

Without saying a word, Crowley drew his gun, and
cut the policeman down with a shower of l/?ad. As the
dying cflicer fell, Crowley leaped out of the car, grabbed
the officer’s revolver, and fired another bullet into the
prostrate body. And that was the killer who said;
“Under my coat is a weary heart, but a kind one—one
that jvould do nobody any harm.”

Crowley was sentenced to the electric chair. When he
arrived at the death house at SingrSing, did he say,
“This is what I get for killing people?” No, he said:
“This is what I get for defending myself.”

The point of the story is this “Two Gun” Crowley
didn’t blame himself for anything.

Is that an unusual attitude among criminals? If
you think so, listen to this: ^ ^

“I have spent the best years of my life giving people
. the lighter pleasures, helping them have a good time,
and all I get is abuse, the existence of a hunted man.’’

That’s A1 Capone speaking. Yes, America’s erst¬
while Public Enemy Number One—the niosf sinister
gang leader who ever shot up Chicago. Capone doesn’t
condemn himself. He actually regards himself as a
public benefactor—an unappreciated and misimder-
stood public benefactor.

And so did Dutch Schultz before he crumpled up
under gangster bullets in Newark. Dutch Sdhultz, one

27

DONT KICK QVER THE BEEHIVE

of New York’s nmst notorious rats, s<|i(l in a nevrepaper
interview that he was n public benefactor. And He
believed it. • • '

I have had some interesting correspondence with
Warden Lawes of Sing Sing on this subject, and he de¬
clares that “few.of the criminals in Sing* Sing regard
themselves aS bad men. They are just as human as you
and I. So they rationalize, they explain. They can tell
you why tfiey had to crack a safe or be quick on the
trigger finger. Most of them attempt by a form of rea¬
soning, fallacious or logical, to justify their anti-social
acts even to themselves, consequently stoutly maintain-
i.ig that they should never have been imprisoned at all.”

If A1 Capone,*“Two Gun” Crowley, Dutch Schultz,
the desperate men behind prison walls don’t blame
themselves for anything—what about the people with
whom you and 1 come in contact?

9

The late John Wanamaker once confessed: “I leafned
thirty years ago that it is foolish to scold. I have enough
trouble overcoming my own limitations without fret-,
ting over the fact that God has not seen fit to distribute
evenly the gift of intelligence. ”

Wanamaker learned this lesson early; bat 1 person- '
ally had to blunder through this old world for a third
• otit.centu^ before it even began to dawn upon me that
iiinety-nine times out of a hundred, no man ever criti¬
cizes himself for anything, no matter how wrong he
may be.

Criticism is futile because it puts J^man on the defen-
*sive, aftd“usually makes him strive to justify himself.
Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a man’s pre¬
cious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses
his resentment. ^ '

Thp German army won’t let a soldier file a complaint
and make a criticisrr; immediately after a thing has hap¬
pened. He has to sleep on his grudge first and cool o0.

28 FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES

1

If he files his complaint immediately, he is punished.

the eternals, there ought to be a law like that in civil
li^.too—a law for whining parents and nagging wives
and scolding employers and 'the whole obnoxious
parade oi fault-finders.

You will find examples of the futility of criticism
bristling on a thousand pages of history. Take, for ex¬
ample, the famous quarjrel between Theodore'Roosevelt
and President Taft—a quarrel that split Ihe Repub¬
lican Party, put Woodrow Wilson in the White House,
and wrote bold, luminous lines across the World War
and altered the flow of history. Let’s review the facts
quickly:,W^en Theodore Roosevelt stepperfput of the
White House in 1908, he made Taft president, and
then went off to Africa to shoot lions. WTien he re¬
turned, he exploded. He denounced Taft for his con¬
servatism, tried to secure the nomination for a third
term himself, formed the Bull Moose Party, and all but
demolished the G.O.P. In the election that followed,
William Howard Taft and the Republican Party car-
‘iied only two states—^Vermont and Utah. The most
disastrous defeat the old party had ever known.

Theodore Roosevelt blamed Taft; but did President
Taft blame himself? Of course not. With tears in his
eyes, Taft said; “I don’t see how 1 could have done
any differently from what I have.” •

WTio was to blame? Roosevelt or Taft? Frankly, I
don’t know, and I don’t care. The point 1 am trying to
make is that all of Theodore Roosevelt’s criticism’
didn’t persuade Taft that he was wrong.'It .merely
made Taft strive to ju^ify himself and to reiterate with
tears in his eyes : *T don’t see how I could have done
any'differently from what I have.”

Or, take the Teapot Dome Oil scandal. Remember
it? Jt kept the newspapers ringing vdth indignation ior
years. It rocked the nation. Nothing like it bad ever

29

DONT KICK OVER THE BEEHIVE

happened .before’in American public life within the
memory or living men. Here are the bare facts of the
scandal: Albert Fall, Secretarj^ of the Intepof in Hafd-
ing’s cabinet, was entrilsted with the leasing^ govern¬
ment oil reserves at Elk Hill and Teapot Dome—oil
; reserves that had been set aside for the futuVe use of the
Navy. Did Sbcretary Fall permit competitive bidding?
No sir. He handed the fat, juify contract outright to
his friend, Edward L. Doheny. And what did Doheny
do? He gave Secretary Fall what he was pleased to call
a “loan” of one hundred thousand dollars. Then, in a
high-handed manner. Secretary Fall ordered United
States Mafines into.the district to drive off conjpetitors
whose adjacent wells were sapping oil out of the Elk
Hill reserves. These competitors, driven off their
ground at the ends of guns and bayonets, rushed into
court—and blew the lid off the hundred million dollar
Teapot Dome scandal. A stench arose so vile A^t it
ruined the Harding administration, nauseated an entire
nation, threatened to wreck the Republican Party, and
put Albert B. Fall behind prison bars.

Fall was condemned viciously—condemned as few
men in public life have ever been. Did'he repent?
Never ! Years later Herbert Hoover intimated in’ a
* speech that President Harding’s death had been
Sue to mental anxiety and won*y because a friend had
betrayed him. When Mrs. Fall heard that, she sprang
from her chair, she wept, she shook her fists at fate, and
’screamed: “What! Harding betrayed by Fall ? No !
•My husbafid never betrayed anyone. 'This whole house
full of gold would not tempt my .husband to do wrong.
He is the one who has been betrayed and led to the
slaughter and crucified. ► -

There you are: human nature in action, the wrong-
doe*r blaqiing everybody but himself. We are all like
that. §0 when youf and I are tempted to criticize some-

a K

30 FUNDAMENTAL .TECHNIQUES

one tomorrow, let’s remember AI Capbne, “Two Gui>’’
Crowley, and Albert Fall. L^t’s realize that criticisns
arVlike hbnyng pigeons. They always return hume.
Let’s I'ealize that the person we are going to correct and
condemn’will probably justify himself, and condemn us
in return; of, like the gentle Taft, he jvill say: “I den fc
see how I could have done any differently? from what I
have.’’

On Saturday morning, April 15, 1865, Abraham

Lincoln lay dying in a hall bedroom of a cheap lodging
house directly across the street from Ford’s Thea^;'e^
where Booth had shot him. Lincoln’s long body lay
stretched diagonally across a sagging bed that was too
short for him. A cheap reproduction of Rosa Bonhen
famous painting, “The Horse Fair,’’ hung abovt
bed, and a dismal gas jet flickered yellow light.

t

As‘Lincoln lay dying, Secretary of War Stai.lon
said, “There lies the most perfect ruler of men that the
world has ever seen.’’

What was the secret of Lincoln’s success in deal; ig
with men? I studied the life of Abraham Lincc! i for
ten years, and devoted all of three years to writing and
relvriting a book entitled Lincoln ihe LJnhno'xri. \
believe 1 have made as detailed and exhaustive a study •
df Lincoln’s personality and home life as it’is pos'^f'
for any human being to make. I made a special study of
Lincoln’s method of dealing with men. Did he indulge
in criticism?'Oh, yes. As a young man in the Pigeon*
Creek Valley of Ifidiana, he not only criticized, but he*
wrote letters and poeips ridiculing people and dropped
these letters on the country roads where they were sure
to.be found. One of these letters aroused resentments
that burned for a lifetime.

t.

Even after Lincoln had become a practicing lav^yer
in Springfield, Illinois, he attacked his opponents openly

31

DONT KICK OVER THE BEEHIVE

in letters published in the newspap^s. But he did
this just once too often. , •

In the autumn of he ridiculed a '^ain, pugna¬
cious Irish politician by the name of James^hields.
Lincoln lampooned him’through an anonymous letter
published in tJie Springfield Journal. The town roared
with laughter. Shields, sensitive and proud, boiled with
indignation..He found out who wrote the letter, leaped
on his horse, started after Lincoln, and challenged him
to fight a duel. Lincoln didn’t want to fight. He was
opposed to dueling; but he couldn’t get out of it and
save his hoEor. He was given the choice of weapons.
Since he hud very Ipng arms, he chose cavalry broad
swords, took lessons in sw'ord fighting from a West
Point graduate; and, on the appointed day, he and
Shields met on a sand bar in the Idissipsippi River,
prepared to fight to the death; but, at the last myiute,
their seconds interrupted and stopped the duel. •

7 hat was the incst lurid personal incident in Lin¬
coln’s life. It taught him an invaluable lesson in the art
of dealing with people. Never again did he write an
insulting letter. Never again did he ridicule anyone.
And from that time on, he almost never criticized
anybody for anything.

* Time after time, during the Civil War, Lincoln puf
a new general at thahead of the Army of the Potomac,
and each one in turn—^McClellan, Pope, Burnside,
Hooker, Meade—^blundered tragically, and drove Lin¬
coln to 4 >aclng the floor in despair.”* Half the nation
savagely condemned these inconjpetent generals, but
Lincoln, “with malice towards none, with charity for
all,” held his peace. One of his favorite quotations wets
“Judge not, that ye be not judged.” •

And when Mrs. Lincoln and others spoke harshly of
the Southern people, Lincoln replied: “Don’t criticize

32 FUNDAMENTA4 TECHNIQUES.

them; they are just what we would-be under similar
tfircumstances. ^

Yet^ if* any man ever had occa|ion to criticize, suilely
it was Lincoln. Let’s take one illustration:

The Battle of Gettysburg was fought during the firs|'
three days of July, 1863. During the night of July 4,.
Lee began to retreat southward while storm clouds de¬
luged the country with rain. When Leer reached the
Potomac with his defeated army, he found a swollen,
impassable river in front of him, and a victorious Union ,
army behind him. Lee was in a trap. He couldn’t es- ’
cape. Lincoln saw that. Here was a golden, heaven¬
sent ofiportunity—the opportunity to caffture Lee’s
army and end the war immediate!]^ So, with a surge
of high hope, Lincoln ordered Meade not to call a
council of war but to attack Lee immediately. Lincoln
teleg’‘aphed his orders and then sent a special messen-
gei’ to Meade demanding immediate action.

And what did General Meade do'? He did the very
opposite of what he was told to do. He called a council
of war in direct violation of Lincoln’s orders. He hesi¬
tated. He procrastinated. He telegraphed all manner
of excuses? He refused point blank to attack Lee. Fi¬
nally the waters receded and Lee escaped over the
J^otomac with his forces.

Lincoln was furious. “What does this mean?’’ Lin¬
coln cried to his son Robert. “Great God ! What does
this mean? .We had them within our grasp, and had
oyly to stretch fqrth our hands and they were ours; yet
nothing that I could say or do could make Tche army
move. Under the circumstances, almost any general
could have defeated Lee. If 1 had gone up there, I
could h 2 |.ye whipped him myself.’’

In bitter disappointment, Lincoln sat down and wrote
Meade this letter. And rememW, at this period df his
life he was extremely conservative and restrained in his

33

I>ONT KICK OVER THE BEEHIVE

4

phraseolo^. So’ this letter ■coming ^rom Lincoln in
1863 was tantamount’to the severest rebuke. •

“My dear General,* • . •

*‘I do not believe you appieciate the rpa^nitude of
the misfortune involved in Lee’s escape. He was
wilhin our easy grasp, and to have closed upon him
would, irv connection with our other late successes,
have ended the war. As it is, the war will be pro-
lo'nged indefinitely. If you could not safely attack
Lee last Monday, how can you possibly do so south
oi the river, when you can take with you very few—
no more than two-^thirds of the force you then had in
hand ? It would be unreasonable to expect and I do
not expect that you can now effect much. Your
golden opportunity is gone, and 1 §m distressed
immeasurably because of it.” ^

\\nrat do you suppose Meade did when he read that

lettt-i’ ?

Meade never saw that letter. Lincoln never mailed it.
It v/as found among Lincoln’s papers after his death.

My guess is—^and this is only a guess—that after
. writing that letter, Lincoln looked out of the w’indow
"n^Said to’himself, “Just a minute. Maybe I ought not
to be so hasty. It is easy enough for me to sit here in
the quiet of the White House and order Meade to at-
«tack; but if I had been up at Gettysburg,, and if 1 had
.seen as much blood as Meade has seen during the last
week, ancTif my ears had been pierced with the screams
and shrieks of the wounded and dVing, maybe 1 wouldn’t
be so anxious to attack either. If I had Meade’s timid
temperament, perhaps I would have done ju%t what he
has dqne. Anyhow, it is water under the bridge now.
If !■ send this letter, ij will relieve my feelings but it will
make M&de try to justify himself. It will make him

34

FUNDAMENTAL- TECHNIQUES

condemn me. It will arduse hard feelings,^ impair ail
his further usefulness as a commander, and perhaps
force him to resign from the arnriy.” ' *

So. as, I have already said, Lincoln put the letter
aside, foh he had learned by bitter experience that
sharp criticisms and rebukes almost invariably end in
futility.

Theodore Roosevelt* said that when he, us President,
was confronted by some perplexing problem, he used
to lean back and look up at a large painting of Lincoln
that hung above his desk in the White House and ask
himself, “What would Lincoln do if he were in my
shoes ? ’'How would he solve this problem

The next time we are tempted to give somebody “hail
Gjlumbia.” let’s pull a five-dollar bill out of our pocket,
look at Lincoln’s picture on the bill, and ask, “Kow
would Lincoln handle this problem if he had it

Do you know someone you would Jike to change end
^regulate and improve? Good ! That is fine. I am all in
favor of it. But why not begin on yourself? From a
purely selfish standpoint, that is a lot more profitable
than tryinfi; to Improve others—yes, and a lot less
dangerous.

“When a man’s fight begins within himself,’_^said
Browning, “he is worth something.” It will probably
take from now until Christmas tp perfect yourself.
You can then have a nice long rest over the holidays
and devote the New Year to regulating and criticizing
other people. ™..v.

But perfect yourself first.

/'Don’t complain about the snow on your neighbor’s
roof,” said Confucius, “when your own doorstep Is
unclean.”

When I was still young and trying hard to impress
gjeople, 1 wrote a foolish letter to* Richard Harding

35

DONT'KICK OVER THE BEEHIVE

Davis, an^author who once loomed Ivge on the literary
horizon of America; I jvas preparing a magazine ar¬
ticle about authors; ind I asked Davis to,telI me about
his method of work. A*few weeks earlier, I had received
a letter from someone with t|iis notation at ^e bottom:
“Dictated but not read.” I was quite imp'ressed. I felt
the \vriter nfust be ve^ big and busy and important. I
wasn’t the slightest bit busy; but I was eager to make
an impression on Richard Harding Davis so I ended
my short note with the words: “Dictated but not read.”

He never troubled to answer the letter. He simply
returned it to me with this scribbled across the bottom:
“Your bad manners are exceeded only by your bad
manners.” Tru%, I had blundered, and perhaps I de¬
served his rebuke. But, being human, I resented it. I
resented it so sharply that when I read of the death of
Richard Harding Davis ten years later, the one thought
that still persisted in my mind—I am ashamed to admit
—was the hurt h/s had given me.

If you and I want to stir up a resentment tomon o\^
that may rankle across the decades and endure until
death, just let us indulge in a little stinging criticism
—no matter how certain we are that it is justified.

When dealing with people, let us remember we *are
nAtjdealin^ with creatures of logic. We are dealing with
creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with preju- '
dices and motivated by pride and vanity.

And ciiticism is a dangerous spark—a spark that is
liable to cause an explosion in the powder magazine of
pride-^ii explosion that sometimes hastens death.
For example, General Leonard Wood was criticized
and not allowed to go with the army to France. That
blow to his pride probably shortened his lif^. * *

Bitter criticism caus^ the sensitive Thomas Hardy,
one of ^he finest novelists that ever enriched English
literature, to give up the v/riting of fiction forever.

36 FUNDAMENTAL ^TECHNIQUES

Criticism drove Jliomas Chatterton, the English poet
to suicide.

Benjamin'Franklin, tactless iu'liis youth, became so
diplomatif, so adroit at handling people that he was
made American Ambassador to France. The secret of
his success? “I will speak ill of no he said,

. -and speak all the good I know of everybody.”

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain—and
most fools do.

But it takes character and self-control to be under¬
standing and forgiving. <>

“A great man shows his greatness,** said Carlyle
"by the way he treats little men.”

Instead of .<:ondemning people, let’s try to under¬
stand,them. Let’s try to figure out why they do what
they do. That’s a lot more profitable and intriguing
than criticism; and it breeds sympathy, tolerance, and
kindness. “To know all is to forgive all.”

As Dr. Johnson said : ‘‘God Himself, sir, does not
propose to judge man until the end of his days.”

'Why should you and I ?

TUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES

IN HANDLING PEOPLE
• .

CHAPTER TWO

TPiE BIG SECRET 6 f DEALING
WITH PEOPLE

^I NHERE is only one way under high Heaven to get
anybody to do anything. Did you ever stop to
think of that? Tes, just one way. And that is by
making the other person want to do it.

Remember, there is no other way. o

Of course, you can make a man want to give you his
watch by sticking a revolver in his ribs. You can make
an employee give* you co-operation—until your back is
turned—by threatening to fire him. You can make sr
child do what you want it to do by a whip or a threat.
But these crude methods have sharply undesirable
repercussions.

The only way I can get you to do anything is by
giving you what yob want.

What do you w^nt ?

The famous Dr. Sigmund Freud of Vienna, one of
’the most distinguished psychologists of the twentieth
century^ says that everything you* and I do springs
from two motives: the sex urg^ and the desire to be
great.

Professor John tl^l^vey, America’s most profSttnd
philosopher, phrases it a bit differently. Dr. Dewey
says £he deepest urge in human nature is “the desire to
be impcflrtant.’’ Reihember that phrase: “the desire to

38 FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES

be ini]3ortant.” It is significant. You-are going to hear
H,lot about it in this book.

What do you want ? Not manj' things, but the few
things 'tlwt you do wish, you cfave with an insistence
that will ijot be denied.. Almost every normal adult
wants—

1. Health and the preservation of life.

2. Food.

3. Sleep.

4. Money and the things money will buy.

5. Life in the hereafter.

6. Sexual gratification.

7. The well-being of our children.

8. A feeling of importance.

Almost all these wants are gratified—^all except one.
But there is Oi'ie longing almost as deep, almost as im¬
perious, as the desire for food or sleep which is seldom
gratified. It is what Freud calls “the desire to be great.”
It is what Dewey calls the “desire td be important.”

Lincoln once be^an a letter by saying: “Everybody
likes a compliment. ’ William James said: “The deepest
principle in human nature is the craving to be apjsre-
ciated.” He"didn’t speak, mind you, of the “wish ’ or
the “desire” or the “longing” to be appreciated. He
s?id the **craving" to be appreciated.

Here is a gnawing and unfaltering human hunger;
and the rare individual who honestly satisfies this heart-
hunger will hold people in the palm of his hand and'
“even the undertaker will be sorry when he dies.”

The desire for a feeling of importance is one of the
chief distinguishing differences between mankind and
the animals. To illustrate: When I was a farm boy out
in Missouri, my father bred fine Duroc-Jersey hogs and
pedigreed white-faced cattle. We used to exhibit our
hogs and white-faced cattle at the dounty fairs end live-

39

THE BIG SECRET

stock shows throughout the. Middle West. We won
first prizei} by the score. My fathef*pinned his blue
ribbons on a sheet of white muslin, and when friends or
visitors came to the nouse, he would get*out the long
sheet of muslin. He would hold one end anJ-1 would
hold the other while he exhibited the blue, ribbons.

The hogs didn’t care about the ribbons they had won.
But Father did. These prizes ^gave him a feeling of
imoortance!

If our ancestors hadn’t had this flaming urge for a
feeling of importance, civilization would have been
impossible. Without it, we should have been just
about likewthe animals. •

it was this desire for a feeling of importance that led
an uneducated, poverty-stricken grocery clerk to study
some law books that he found in the bottpm of a barrel
of household plunder that he had bought for fiftv cents.
You have probably heard of this grocery clerk. ‘His
name was Lincolo.

it was this desire for a feeling of importance that in-,
spired Dickens to write his immortal novels. This
desire inspired Sir Christopher Wren to design his
symphonies in stone. This desire made .Rockefeller.
amass millions that he never spent! And this same desire
• ntfide the richest man in your town build a house far
ioo large for his requirements. •

This desire makes you want to wear the latest styles,
^ive the latest car, and talk about your brilliant
children. ^

It is fKis desire which lures many boys into becoming
gangsters and gunmen. “The average young criminal
of today," says E. P, Mulrooney, former Police Com¬
missioner of New York, "is filled with ego, and his flfst
request after arrest is for those lurid newspapers that
make him out a hero. The disagreeable prospect of tak¬
ing a ‘hot squat’ in tlie electric chair seems remote, so

40

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES

long ds he can gloat over his likeness sharing space
with pictures or Babe Ruth, LaGuardiat Einstein
Lindbergh, Toscanini, or Roosevelt.”

If you tell me how you get ^ur feeling of impor¬
tance, I’ll tell you what you are. That determines your
character. That is the inost significant thing about
you. For example, John D. Rockefeller gets his feeling
of importance by giving money to erect a modern hos¬
pital in Peking, Cbina,‘to care for millions of poor peo¬
ple whorn he has never seen and never will see. Dil-
linger, on the other hand, got his feeling of importance
by being a bandit, a bank robber and killer. Wlien the
G-men were hunting him, he dashed into a farmhouse
up in Minnesota and said, “I’m Dillinger !” He was
proud of the fact that he was Public Enemy Number
One. “I’m not going to hurt you, but I’m Dillinger 1”
he said.

Yes> the one significant difference between Dillinger
and* Rockefeller is how they got their feeling of
importance. '

History sparkles with amusing examples of famous
people struggling for a feeling of importance. Even
George Washington wanted to be called “His Mighti-
- ness, the President of the United States”; and Colum¬
bus pleaded for the title, “Admiral of the Ocean and
Viceroy of India.” Catherine the Great refused to open
letters that were not addressed to “Her Imperial Maj¬
esty”; and Mrs. Lincoln, in the Wliite House, turned
upon Mrs. Grant like a tigress and shouted, “ How dai;g
you be seated in my presence until I invite you !”

Our millionaires helped finance Admiral ^d’s ex- ‘
pedition to the Antarctic with the understating that
ranges of icy mountains would be named alter them;
andr Victor Hugo aspired to haw nothing less than the
city of Paris renamed in his honor. Even Shakespeare,
mightiest of the mighty, tried to add luster to his name
by procuring a coat of arms for hi§ family. »

4!

THE BIp SECRET

.People eometimes become.invalid^in order fo win
sympathy ^lid attention, and get a tiling of import
tance. For evijTnple, ^ake Mrs. McKinley. She got a
feeling of importanc6'by forcing her husband-, the
President of the United States, to neglect important
affairs of state while he reclined on the bed beside her
for hours at »time, his arm about her, soothing her to
sleep. She fed her gnawing desire for attention by in¬
sisting that*he remain with her while she was having
her teeth fixed, and once created a stormy scene when
he had to leave her alone with the dentist while he kept
an appointment with John Hay.

Mary I^oberts Rinehart once told me of a^ bright,
vigorous young*woman who became an invalid in order
to get a feeling of importance. “One day,” said Mrs.
Rinehart, “this woman had been obliged to face some¬
thing, her age perhaps, and the fact that she would
never be married. The lonely years were strefthing
ahead and there was little left for her to anticipate.

“She took to her bed; and for ten years her old
mother traveled to the third floor and back, carrying
trays, nursing her. Then one day the old mother, weary
with service, lay down and died. For some weeks, the
invalid languished; then she got up, put on her clothir\g.
and resumed living again.”

Some authorities declare that people may actually
*go insailjl^n order to find, in the dreamland of insanity,
the feelin^f importance that has been denied them in
the harsh world of reality. There are more patients suf¬
fering from mental ^fWi»?S<Bes in the hospitals in The
United States than from all other diseases combined.
If you are over fiftee^ years of age and residing in New
York Stafle, the chances are one. out of twenty that you

42

FUNDAMENTAL, TECHNIQUES

will be confined to an insane asylum for seven years of
your life. ^

What is the cause of insanity ?

Nobody can answer such a sweeping question as that,
but we hnpw that certain diseases, such as syphilis
break down and destroy the brain cells and result in in¬
sanity. In fact, about one-half of all mental diseases
can be attributed to such physical causes^ as brain le¬
sions, alcohol, toxins, and injuries. But the other half
— and this is the appalling part of the story— the other
half of the people who go insane apparently have noth¬
ing organically wrong with their brain cells. In post-
morten) examinations, when their brain tissues are
studied under the highest-powered ihicroscopes, they
are found to be apparently just as healthy as yours and
mine.

t

Wky do these people go insane ?

I recently put that question to the head physician of
one of our most important hospiUils for the insane.
This doctor, who has received the highest honors and
the most coveted awards for his knowledge of insanity,
told me frankly that he didn’t know why people went
insane. Nobody knows for sure. But he did say that
many people who go insane find in insanity a feeling of
importance that they were unable to achieve ip the
world of reality. Then he told me this story :

“ 1 have a patient right now who'se marriage proved
to be a tragedy. She wanted love, sexual gratificatioa,
children, and social prestige; but life blasted all her^
hopes. Her husband didn’t love her. He refused even
to eat with her, and forced her to serve his meals in his
room upstairs. She had no children, no social standing.
She went^insane; and, in her imagination, she divorced
her husband and resumed her maiden name. She now
believes she has married into the English aristocracy,
and she insists on being called Lady Smith. '

43

THE BIG SECRET

*'Aucl as. for children, she imagines now that she has
a new child every night. Each time T call on her shq,
says : ‘Doctor, I had | baliy last night.’ ” ^ .

Life once wrecked her dream ships on the sharp
rocks of reality; but in the sunny, fantastic isles of in¬
sanity, all her barkentines race into port with canvas
billowing and<*witn winds singing through the masts.

Tragic? Oh, I don’t know, tier physician said to
me : .“If I could stretch out my hand and restore her
sanity, i wouldn’t do it. She’s much happier as she is.”

As a group. Insane people are happier than you and
I. Many eijjoy being insane. Why shouldn’t they?
They have.solvqd their problems. They will wiite you
a check for a miilion dollars, or give you a letter of
introduction to the Aga Khan. They have found in a
dream world of their own creation the feeling of im¬
portance which they so deeply desired.

If some people are so hungry for a feeling of impor¬
tance that they at^ually go insane to get it, imagine
what miracles you and I can achieve by giving people
honest appreciation this side of insanity.

There have been, so far as I know, only two people in
histoi*y who were paid a salary of a milliop dollars a
year: Walter Chrysler and Charles Schwab.

. ^Tiy did Andrew, Carnegie pay Schwab a million
dollars a year or more than three thousand dollars a'
day? Why?

Andrew Carnegie paid Charles Schwab a million dol¬
lars a year. Because Schwab is a genius ? No. Because
he knew Wiore about the manufacture df steel than other
people ? Nonsense. Charles Schwab told me himself
that he had many men working for him who knew more
about the manufacture of steel than he did.

Schwab says that he was paid this salary largely be¬
cause of his ability to deal with people. I asked him
he did it. Here is his. secret set down in his own wordfe—

44

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES

words that ough^t to be cast in eternal bronze and hung
kn every home and school, every shop and office in the
land— words that children ought to memorize instead of
wasting their time memorizing ^.he conjugation of Latin
verbs or the amount of the annual rainrall in Brazil—
words that will all but transform yoyr life and mine if
we will only live them:

“/ consider my ability to arouse enthusiasm among
the men,'* said Schwab, "the greatest asset I possess,
and the way to develop the best that is in a man is by
appreciation and encouragement.

"There is nothing else that so kills the ambitions oj
a man ns criticisms from his superiors. J never criticize
anyone. I believe in giving a man incentive to work. So
I am anxious to praise bat loath to find fault. If I like
anything, I am hearty in my approbation and lavish in
my praise."

That is what Schwab does. But what does the aver¬
age man do ? The exact opposite, ff he doesn’t like a
thing, he raises the Old Harry; if he does like it, he
says nothing.

“In my wide association in life, meeting with many
and great Qfien in various parts of the world,” Schwab
declared, “1 have yet to find the man, however great or
exalted his station, who did not do better work and
horth greater effort under a spirit of approval than i.c
would ever do under a spirit of criticism.”

That he said, frankly, was one of the outstancmg
reasons for the phenomenal success of Andrew Carne¬
gie. Carnegie praised his associates publiclyas well as
privately.

Carnegie wanted to praise his assistants even op his
tOinbstone. He wrote an epitaph for himself which
read: “Here lies one who knew how to get around him
men who were cleverer than himself.’

Sincere appreciation was one of the secrets of Rocke-

4S

THE Bia SECRET

t

feller' s success inf handling men. Fo{ example, when
one of his partners, Edward T. Bedford, pulled a bone?
and lost the firm a imllion dollars by a .bad buy in
South America, John D. might have criticiz^; but he
knew Bedford had done his best— and the incident was
closed. So Rockefeller found something t6 praise; he
ccngMtulated*Bedford because he had been able to save
sixty per cent of the money he had invested. “ That s
splendid,” shid Rockefeller, ‘we don’t always do as
well as that upstairs.”

Ziegfeld, the most spectacular entrepreneur who ever
dazzled Bijoadway, gained his reputation by hi,s subtle
ability to ‘glorify the American girl.” He repeatedly
took some drab little creature that no one ever looked at
tVvice and transformed her on the stage into a glamor¬
ous vision of mystery and seduction. Knowing the
vaiue of appreciation and confidence, he made whmen
feci beautiful by the sheer power of his gallantry and
consideration. He*was practical: he raised the salary of
chorus girls from thirty dollars a week to as high as
one hundred and seventy-five. And he was also
chivalrous: on opening night at the Follies, he sent a
telegram to the stars in the cast, and he "deluged
every chorus girl in the show with American Beauty
'ro*'es,

i once succumbed to the fad of fasting and went for
iw days and nights without eating. It w'asn’t difficult.
I was less hungry at the end of the sixth day than I was
at the end of the second. Yet I know, and you know,
people who would think they had* committed a crime if
they let their families or employees go for six days with¬
out food; but they will let them go for six day?, and six
weeks.^and sometimes sixty years without giving them
the hearty appreciatiijn that they crave almost as much
as they cftive food.-

46 FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES

'*W

► .V

When Alfred Lunt« played the stellar ,role in Re-
*union in Vienna, he said, “There is nothing I need so
much as* nourishment for my s^i-esteem.”

We nourish the bodies of our children and friencis
and employees; but how seldom do we nourish their
self-esteem. We provide them with roast beef and pota¬
toes to build energy; but we neglect to give them kind
words of appreciation that would sing in.thetr memo¬
ries for years like the music of the morning stars.

Some readers are saying right now as they read tliese
lines: “Old stud ! Soft soap ! Bear oil! Flattery ! I’ve
tried that stuff. It doesn’t work—not with intelligent
peoplei^’ ■ *

Of course, flattery seldom works with discernins
people. It is shallow, selfish, and insincere. It ought
to fail and it usually does. True, some people are
so hungry, so thirsty, for appreciation that they wJl
swallow an 5 rthing, just as a starving man will eat grass
and fish worms.

Why, for example, were the much-married Mdivani
brothers such flaming successes in the matrimonial mar¬
ket ? Why were these so-called “Princes” able to marry
tjvo beuUtiful and famous screen stars and a world-
famous prima donna and Barbara Hutton with her five-
.and-ten-cent-store millions ? Why? How .did they do
it?

“The Mdivani charm for women,” said Adela Rogers
St. Johns, in an article in the magazine Liberty, 'V ..
has been among{,the mysteries of the ages to many.

“Pola Negri, a woman of the world, a connoisseur of
men, and a great artist, once explained it to me. She
s?;d, ‘They understand the art of flattery as do no other
men I have ever met. And the art of flattery is almost
a lost one in this realistic and humorous age. That, I
assure you, is the secret of the Mdivani charm for
women. 1 know.*

THE BIG SECRET

47

Even Qftf en Vidtoria was susceptibly to flattery. Dis¬
raeli confessed that he pyt it on thick in dealing witl.
the Queen. To use hi?, exact words, he said he “spread
it on with a trowel.” But Disraeli was one of the most
polished, deft, and adroit men who ever ruled the far-
flung British Empire. He was a genius in his line.
What would work for him wouldn’t necessarily work
for you, and me. In the long ruji, flattery will do you
more barm than good. Flattery is counterfeit, and like
counterfeit money, it will eventually get you into
trouble if you try to pass it.

The difference between appreciation and flattery?
That is simple.,One is sincere and the other insincere.
One comes from the heart out; the other from the teeth
out. One is unselfish; the other selfish. One is univer¬
sally admired; the other is universally c^pndemned.

I recently saw a bust of General Obregon in the
Chapultepec palace in Mexico City. Below the bust "are
carved these wise words from General Qbregon’s
philosophy : “Don’t be afraid of the enemies who
attack you. Be afraid of the friends who flatter you,”

No ! No ! No ! I am not suggesting flattery! Far
from it. I’m talking about a new way of llf«*!’^Let me'
repeat. / am talking about a new way of life.

• King Gebrge V had a set of six maxims displayed on
the walls of his sttydy at Buckingham Palace. One of
these maxims said: “Teach me neither to proffer nor
tftcive cheap praise. ” That’s all flattery is : cheap
•praise. I once read a definition of flattery that may be
worth repeating: “Flattery is telling the other man
precisely what he thinks about himself.”

“Use what langufige you will,” said Ralph Waido
Emerson, ' ‘you can never say an 3 rthmg but what you
are/’

ft

If all we had td do was to use flattery, everybody

48 FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES

woulci catch on, to it and we should all be •experts in
human relations.

When we“ are not engaged inHhinking about some
definite problem, we usually spend about 95 per cent of
our time thinking about ourselves. Now, if we stop
thinking about ourselves for awhile and ^gin to think
of the other man’s good points, we won’t have to resort
to flattery so cheap and false that it can be spotted
almost before it is out of the mouth.

I

Emerson said: “Every man I meet is my superior in
some way. In that, I learn of him.”

(•

If that was true of Emerson, isn’t it likely to be a
thousand times more true of you and me? Let’s ceas^
thinking of our accomplishments, our wants. Let’s try
to figure out fhe other man’s good points. Then forget
flattery. Give honest, sincere appreciation. Be “hearty
in your approbation and lavish in your praise,” and
people will cherish your words and treasure them and
repeat them over a lifetime—repeat them years after
you have forgotten them.

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES
IN HANDLING PEOPLE

CHAPTER TI®EE

■HE WHO CAN DO THIS HAS THE
WHOLE WORLD WITH HIM.

ME WHO CANNOT WALKS
* ‘A LONELY WAY.”

I GO EsKing up in Maine every summer. Personally
I am very fond of strawberries and* cream; but I
find that for some strange reason fish prefer worms. So
when 1 go fishing, I don’t think about what I wanl. I
think about what they want. I don’t bait the hook with
strawberries and cream. Rather, I dangle a worm or a
grasshopper in front of the fish and say: “Wouldn’t
you like to have that ?”

Why not use the same common sense wt im fishin g*
for men ?

.“That is*what Lloyd George did. W^en someone
asked him how he managed to stay in power after all the
other war-time leaders—Wilson, Orlando, and Cle-
ilfcnceau—had been ousted and forgotten, he replied
,that if his staying on top might be attributed to any one
thing, it was probably to the fact that he had learned it
was necessary to bait the hook to suit the fish.

WTiy talk about what we want? That is childish.
Absurd. Of course, you are interested in what you
want. .You are eternally interested in it. But no one
else is. The rest of us are just like you: we are
interested in what “we want.

50

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES

So the only ’~vay on earth to influence the other
fellow is to talk about what, he wants and show him
how to get it.

Remember that tomorrow when you are trying to get
somebody to do something. If, for example, you don’t
want your son to smoke, don’t preach athim.and.don’t
talk about what you want; but show him that cigarettes
may keep him from'making the basebull team or
winning the hundred-yard dash.

This is a good thing to remember regardless of
whether you are dealing with children or calves or
chimpanzees. For example ; Ralph Waldo Emerson
and his son one day tried to get a calf into the barn. But
they made the common mistake of thinking only of
what they wanted: Emerson pushed and his son pulled.
But the calf did just what they did: he thought only of
what he wanted; so he stiffened his legs and stubbornly
refused to leave the pasture. The Irjsh housemaid saw
their predicament. She couldn’t write essays and books;
but, on this occasion at least, she had more horse sense,
or calf sense, than Emerson had. She thought of what
the calf wanted; so she put her maternal finger in the
cilt s mouth, and let the calf suck her finger as she
gently led him into the barn.

* Every act you ever performed since the day you were
born is because you wanted something. How about the
time you gave a hundred dollars to the Red Cross? Y^^s.
that is no exception to the rule. You gave the Red Cross
a hundred dollars ^because you wanted to lend a helping
hand, because you wanted to do a beautiful, unselfish,
divine act. “Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of
theleast of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.’’

If you hadn’t wanted that feeling more than you
wanted your hundred dollars, you would not have made
the contribution. Of course, you may have made the

THE WHOLE WORLD WITH HIM

51

contributfQn because you wfere ashamed to refuse or
because a customer asked you to do it. But one thing ts
certain. You made ithe contribution because you
wanted something.

Professor Harry A. Overstreet in his •illuminating
booH, InfluetictT^ Human Behavior, says : “ Action
springs out of what we fundamentally desire . . . and
the best piece of advice which can be given to would-be
persuaders, whether in business, in the home, in the
school, in politics, is : first, arouse in the other person
an eager want. He who can do this has the whole world
with him. He who cannot walks a lonely way! ”

Andrew Girhegie, the poverty-stricken Scotch lad
who started to work at two cents an hour and finally
gave away three hundred and sixty-five million dollars
— he learned early in life that the only w^y to influence
people is to talk in terms of what the other Person
wants. He attended school only four years, yet he
learned how to h^dle people.

To illustrate : His sister-in-law was worried sick over ‘
her two boys. They were at Yale, and they were so busy
with their own affairs that they neglected to write home
and paid no attention whatever to ihei!"' llioffier’s"
frantic letters.

t

* Then Garnegie offered to wager a hundred dollars
that he could get au answer by return mail, without
even asking for it. Someone called his bet; so he wrote
‘tts nephews a chatty letter, mentioning casually in a
»postscript that he was sending each one a five-dollar

bill.

He neglected, however, to enclose the money.

Back came replies by return mail thanking “Dear
Uncl^ Andrew” for his kind note and— you can finish
the sentmee yourself.

Tomorrow you 'will want to persuade somebody tp

52 FUNDAMENTAL. TECHNIQUES

do something, before you speak, paUse and- ask: “How
■can I make him want to do tt

That question will stop us. from rushing in heed¬
lessly to see people with futile chatter about our desires.

1 rent the grand ballroom of a certain New York
hotel for twenty nights in each season in order tc hold
a series of lectures.

At the beginning of one season, I was suddenly in¬
formed that I should have to pay almost three times as
rnuch rent as formerly. This news reached me after the
tickets had been printed and distributed and all
announcements had been made.

*

Naturally, I didn’t want to pay the increase, but
what was the use of talking to the hotel about what I
wanted? Th^ were interested only in what they wanted.
So a couple of days later I went in to see the manager.

*T was a bit shocked when I got your letter,” I said,
“but 1 don’t blame you at all. If L had been in your
position, I should probably have written a similar letter
myself. Your duty as the manager of this hotel is to
make all the profit possible. If you don’t do that, you
V.::).) be.fi’‘‘‘d and you ought to be fired. Now, let’s take
apiece of paper and write down the advantages and the
disadvantages that will accrue to you, if you insist .on
this increase in rent.”

Then I took a letterhead and raft a line through the
center and headed one column “Advantages” and the
other column “E)isadvantages.”

%

I wrote down under the head of “Advantages” these
words: “Ballroom free.” Then I went on to say: “You
will have the advantage of having the ballroom free
to rent for dances and conventions. That is a big advan¬
tage, for affairs like that will pay you much mote than
you can get for a series of lectures. If 1 tie your ball¬
room up for twenty nights during the course of the

53

THE WHOLE WpRLD WITH HIM

season, it ie sure to mean a loss of sonjjs very profitable
business to*you. ^ •

“Now, let’s consider the disadvantages.^First, in¬
stead of increasing your income from me, you'iire going
to decrease it. In fact, you are going to jvipe it out
because I cannot pay the rent you are asking. I shall be
forced to hold these lectures at some other place.

“There’s another disadvantage to you also. These
lectures attract crowds of educated and cultured peo¬
ple to your hotel. That is good advertising for you,
isn’t it? In fact, if you spent $5,000 advertising in the
newspapers; you couldn’t bring as many people to look
at your hofel as*l can bring by these lectures. *That is
worth a lot to a hotel, isn’t it ?

As I talked, I wrote these two “disadvantages” under
the proper heading, and handed the sheet of j>aper
to the manager, saying: “I wish you would carefully
consider both the^ advantages and disadvantages that
are going to accrue to you and then give me your final
decision. ’

I received a letter the next day, informing me that
my rent would be increased only 50 per ce nt instead of
300 per cent.

‘ .Mipd you, I got this reduction without saying a word
a’bout what I wanted. I talked all the time about wha!
the other person wanted, and how he could get it.

.MiSuppose I had done the human, natural thing: sup¬
pose 1 had stormed into his office ar^l said, “What do
you mean by raising my rent 300 per cent when you
know the tickets have been printed and the announce¬
ments made ? Three hundred per cent! Ridiculous!
Absurd I I won’t pay it!”

What would have happened then ? An argument
would haye begun ta steam and boil and sputter—and
you know how arguments end. Even if I had convinced

54 FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES

r

him diat he was wrong, .his pride would h^e made it
^lifficult for him''to ba^ down and give in/

Here is one of the best bits of ^ivice ever given about
the fine art of human relationships. “If there is any
one secret of success,” said Henry Ford, “it lies in the
ability to get the other person’s point of view and see
things from his angle as well as from your own.”'

That is so good, 1 want to repeat it: “ If there is any
one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the
other person’s point of view and see things from his
angle as well as from your own.”

That is so simple, so obvious, that anyone ought to
see the truth of it at a glance ; yet 90 per cent of the
people on this earth ignore it 90 per cent of the time.

An example ? Look at the letters that come across
your desk tomorrow morning, and you will find that
m6st of them violate this high capnon of common sense.
Take this one, a letter written by the head of the radio
department of an advertising agency with ofiices scat¬
tered across the continent. This letter was sent to the
managers of local radio stations throughout the coun-
try-.Tl_have set down, in parentheses, my reactions to
each paragraph.)

, ^^Mr. John Blank,

Blankville,

Indiana.

Dr. Mr. Blank *

The - company desires to retain its position

in advertising agency leadership in the radio field.*'

(Who cares what your company desires? 1 am
worried about my own problems. The bank is fore¬
closing the mortgage on my house, the bugs are
destroying the hollyhocks, tfie jstock market turn-

55

THE WHOLE WORLD WITH HIM

bled yesterday, I missed the 8:15 this morning, I
wasn t invited to the Jones* dante last night, the
doctor tells me 1 hbve high blood pressure and
neuritis and dandoiff. And then what b^ppens? I
come down to the ofHce this morning worried,
open my mail, and here is some little whipper-
snapper In New York yapping about what his
company wants. Bah! If he only realized what
sort of*impression his letter makes, he would get
out of the advertising business and start manu¬
facturing sheep dip.)

** This*agency's national advertising accounts were
the bulwark'9f the first network. Our subsequent
clearances of station time have kept us at the top of
agencies year after year."

(You are big and rich and right at the top,r are
you ? So whgt ? I don’t give two whoops in Hades
if you are as big as General Motors and General
Electric and the General Staff of the U. S. Army'
all combined. If you had as much sense as a half¬
witted humming bird, you would realize that I am
interested in how big I am—not how B!grSFou*are*
All this talk about your enormous success makes
“me feel small and unimportant.)

"We desire to service our accounts with the last
word on radio station information ”

(You desire! You desire.‘You unmitigated ass.

1 ’m not interested in what you desire or what Mus¬
solini desires, or what Bing Clrosby desires. Let
me tell you once and for all that I am interested
in what / desire—and you haven’t said a word
abdUt that yet m this absurd letter of yours.)-

56 FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES

0

*WilI yoUt ther^ore, put the - copipany on

your preferred''list jor weekly station information—
every single detail that will be useful to an agency
in intelligaitly booking time." • ‘

(“ Preferred list.” You have your nerve ! You
make me feel insignificant by your big talk about
your company—and then you ask me to put you
on a “jpreferred” list, and you don’t even say
‘‘please ’ when you ask it.)

"A prompt acknowledgment of this letter, gioin^^
us your latest ‘ doings, will be mutually helpful .'

(You fool! You mail me a cheap multigraphed
letter—a form letter scattered far and wide like
the autumn leaves ; and you
===FILE=== How to Win Friends and Influence People - full text (public domain).txt
DALE CARNEGIE B.Pd., b.c.s., f.r.g.s., L itt. d.

AUTHOR of HOW TO STOP WORRYING AND START LIVING

POCKET BOOKS, INC., ROCKEFELLER CENTER, NEW YORK

This POCKET BOOK includes every word contained in .the
original, higher-priced edition. It is printed from brand-new
plates made from completely reset, clear, easy-to-read type

HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

Simon and Schuster edition published Xovcmber»- 1936
64 PRiXTi:*'cs

World’s Work (British) edition published September, 3948.

Pocket Book edition published July, 1940
S3rd printing. March, 1956

Co/yyrjfr/tf, 1936, by Dafc Carurgic. This Pocket Book edition- is pub-
lished by QTranncmcnt Ssmon and Schuster, Inc. Printed iu U.S.A.

A*o//ce;' Pocket Book editions are published
by Pocket Books, Inc. Trade mark registered
in the United States and other countries.

CONTENTS

A SHORT-CUT TO DlSTlNCnoN, by Lowell Thomas .... 1

How THIS BOOK WAS WRITTEN — AND WHY, by Dale Carnegie 13

PART I; FUNDAlvDENTAL TECHNIQUES
IN HANDLING PEOPLE

L "If you want to gather honey, don't kick over the bee-
hive" 20

n. The big secret of dealing with people 30

in. VHe who can do this has the whole world with him. He

who cannot walks a lonely w>ay.” 40

Nine suggestions on how to get the most out of
this book 35

PART II; SIX WAYS TO MAKE PEOPLE LIKE YOU

I. Do this and you’ll be welcome anj'where 60

n. A simple way to make a good impression 71

III. If you don’t do this, you ate headed for trouble ... 77

IV. An easy way to become a good conversationalist . . 84

V. How to interest people 93

VI. How to make people like you instantly 96

In a nutshell 108

PART III: TWELVE WAYS TO WIN PEOPLE
TO YOUR WAY OF THINKING

I. You can’t win an argument 109

n. A sure way of making enemies — and how to avoid it . 115

III, If you’re wrong, admit it 125

IV. The high road to a man’s reason 151

-V. The secret of Socrates 140

VI. The safety valve in handling complaints 145

vu. How to get co-operation ... 150

vm. A formula that will work wonders for you . . - . 157

IX. What everybody wants NO

X. An appeal that everybody likes 166

XL The. movies do it. Radio does it. Why don’t you do it? 171
xn. When nothing . else worlcSj try this . ... . . . 174
• In a nutshell ‘ 177

PART TV: NINE WAYS TO CHANGE PEOPLE
WITHOUT GIVING OFFENSE OR
AROUSING RESENTMENT

I. If you must find fault, this is the way to begin . . . 178

n. How to criticize — and not be hated, for .it . ... . 183

m. Talk about j'our own mistakes first . . . . . . 184

IV. No one likes to take orders 187-.

. V., Let the other man save his face 188

■ VI. How to spur men on to success . . . . . . .. 191

. vn. Give the dog a good name 194

vnr. Make the fault seem easy to correct . . ‘ . . . 197

X. Making people glad to do what you want 200

In a nutshell 203

PART V: LETTERS THAT PRODUCED MIRACULOUS

, RESULTS

Letters that produced miraculous results 204

PART VT: SEVEN RULES FOR MAKING
YOUR HOME LIFE HAPPIER

I. How to dig your marital grave in the quickest possible

way 213

n. Love and let live 219

III. Do this and you’ll be looking up the time-tables to Reno 222

IV. A quick way to make everybody happy 225

V. They mean so much to a woman- , . • • 228

VI. If you want to be happ}’, don’t neglect this-one .... 230

vn. Don’t be a ’’marriage illiterate” 234

In a nutshell 233

Index 24l

THIS BOOK IS DEDICATED TO A MAN
WHO doesn’t need TO READ IT: —
ilY CHERISHED FRIEND

HOMER CROY

A SHORT-CUT TO DISTINCTION
By Lowell Tho7}ms

On a cold, winter night last January, two thousand five hun-
dred men and women thronged into the grand ballroom of the
Hotel Pennsylvania in New York. Every available seat was
filled by half past se\'en. At eight o’ clod:, the eager crowd was
still pouring in. 'The spacious balcony was soon jammed; pres-
ently even standing space was at a premium and hundreds of
people, tired after navigating a day in business, stood up for
an hour and a half that night to witness — what.?

A fashion show?

A six-day bicycle race or a personal appearance of Clark
Gable?

No. These people had been lured there by a newspaper ad.
Two evenings previously, they had picked up a copy of the
New York Sun and found a full-page announcement staring
them in the face.

"Increase Your Income
Learn to Speak Effectively
Prepare for Leadership”

Old stuff? Yes, but believe it or not, in the most sophisticated
town on earth, during a depression with tv'ent)’ per cent of the
population on relief, twenty-five hundred people left their
homes and hustled to the Pennsylvania Hotel in response to
tirat ad.

And the ad appeared — remember this — not in a tabloid
sheet, but in the most conseiv'ative evening paper in town — the

I

2 HOW TO WIN FEIEITOS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

York. 5//?;; and the people who responded -were, of the
upper economic strata— executives, einployers, and professional
men with incomes ranging from two thousand to fifty thousand
a year. . .

These men and women had come to hear the opening gun of
an ultra-modern, ultra-practical course in "Effective Speaking
and Influencing Men in Business” — a course given by the Dale
Carnegie Institute of Effective Speaking and Human Relations.

Why were they there, these two thousand five hundred busi-
ness men and women.^

Because of a sudden hunger for more education due to the
depression?

Apparently not, for this same course had been playing to
packed houses in New York City every season for the past,
twenty-four years. During that time, more than fifteen thou-
sand business and professional men had been trained by Dale
Carnegie. Even large, skeptical, conservative organizations such
as the Westinghouse . Electric & M^ufacturing Company,
McGraw-Hill Publishing Company, Brooklyn Union Gas Com-
pany, Brooklyn Chamber of Commerce, American Institute of
Electrical Engineers, and the New Yodc Telephone, Company
have had this training conducted in their own oflBces for the
benefit of their members and executives.

The fact that these men, ten or tv’cnty years after leaving
grade school, high school, or college, come and take this train-
ing is a glaring commentary on the shocking deficiencies of our
educational system.

What do adults really want to study? That is an important
question ; and, in order to answer it, the University of Chicago.

I the American Association for Adult Education' and the United
Y. M. C. A. Schools made a survey that cost $25,000 and cov-
ered two years.

That surv'ey revealed that the prime inter«t of adults is
health. It also revealed that their second interest is in develop-
ing skill in human relationships; they want to learn- the tech-

A SHORT-CUT TO DISTINCTION

3

don’t want to become public speakers ; and they don't want to
listen to a lot of high-sounding talk about psychology — they
want suggestions that they can use immediately in business, in
social contacts, and in the home.

So that was what adults wanted to study, was it?

"All right,’’ said the people making the surs'ey. "Fine. If
that is what they want, we’ll give it to them.”

Looking around for a textbook, they discovered that no
working manual had ever been written to help people solve
their daily problems in human relationships.

Here was a fine kettle of fish! For hundreds of years, learned
volumes had been written on Greek and Latin and higher
mathematics-^topics about which the average adult doesn’t give
two hoots. But on the one subject on which he has a thirst for
knowledge, a veritable passion for guidance and help —
nothing 1

This explains the presence of twenty-five hundred eager
adults aowding into the grand ballroom of the Hotel Penns)'l-
vania in response to a newspaper advertisement. Here, appar-
ently, at last was the thing for which they had long been
seeking.

Back in high school and college, they had pored over books,
believing that knowledge alone was the open sesame to financial
and professional rewards. -

But a few years in the rough-and-tiunble of business and
professional life had brought sharp disillusionment. They had
seen some of the most important business successes won by men
who possessed, in addition to their knowledge, the ability to
talk well, win people to their way of thinking, and "sell”
themselves and their ideas.

'They soon discovered that if one aspired to wear the captain s
cap and navigate the ship of business, personality and the
ability to talk are more important than a knowledge of Latin
verbs or a sheepskin from Harvard,

The advertisement in the New' York Sun promised that the

4. . HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

meeting in the :Hotel Pennsylvania, would be highly entertain-
ing. It was. . , ' . , . \

Eighteen men who had taken the course were marshaled in.
front of the. loud speaker. — and each of fifteen of them was
given precisely, seventy-five seconds to tell his story. Only
seventy-five seconds of talk, then "bang” went the gavel, and.
the chairman shouted, "Time! Next spe^er!”

' The affair moved with the speed of a herd of buffalo thun-
dering across the plains; Spectators stood for an hour and a
half to watch the performance.

The speakers were a cross section of American business life:
a chain-store executive ; a baker; the president of a trade associ-
ation; two bankers; a truck salesman; a chemical salesman; an
insurance man; the secretary of a brick manufacturers’ associ-
ation; an accountant; a dentist; an architect; a whiskey sales-
man ; a Christian Science practitioner; a druggist who had come
from Indianapolis to New York to take the course; a lawyer
who had come from Havana, in order to prepare him^lf to
give one important three-minute speech.

. Tlie first speaker bore the Gaelic name of Patrick J. O’Haire.
Born in Ireland, he attended school for only four years, drifted .
to America, worked as a rhechanic, then as a chauffeur.

At forty, his family was growing up, he needed more money.;
so he tried to sell automobile trucks. Suffering from an infe-
riority complex that, as he put it, was eating his heart out, he
had to walk up and down in front of an office half a dozen
times before he could summon up enough courage to open the
door. He was so discouraged as a salesman that he was thinking
of going back to work with his hands in a machine shop, when
one day he received a letter inviting him to an organization
meeting of the Dale Carnegie Course in Effective Speaking.

He didn’t .want to attend. He feared he would have to asso-
ciate with a lot of college men, that he would be out of place.

His despairing wife insisted that he go, saying, "It may do
, you some good Pat. God knows you need it.” He. went dorvn
( to tlic place where the meeting was to be held and stood on the

A SHORT-CUT TO DISTINCTION

5

sidewalk for five minutes before he could generate enough
self-confidence to enter the room.

The first few times he tried to speak, he was dizzy with fear.
As the weeks drifted by, he lost all fear of audiences and soon
found that he loved to talk — ^the bigger the crowd, the better.
And he also lost his fear of individuals. He lost his fear of his
own customers. His income mounted and skyrocketed. Today
he is one of the star salesmen in New York City. That night
at the Pennsylvania Hotel, Patrick O’Haire stood in front of
two thousand five hundred people and told a gay, rollick-
ing story of his achievements. Wave after wave of laughter
swept over the audience. Few professional speakers could have
equaled his performance.

The next speaker, Godfrey Meyer, was a grayheaded banker,
the father of eleven children. The first time he attempted to
speak in class, he was literally struck dumb. His mind refused
to function. His story is a vivid illustration of how leadership
gravitates to the man who can talk.

He works on Wall Street and for twenty-five years he has
been living in Clifton, New Jersey. During that time, he had
taken no active part in community aflairs and knew perhaps
five hundred people.

Shortly after he had enrolled in the Carnegie Course, he
received his tax bill and was infuriated at what he considered
unjust charges. Ordinarily, he would have sat at home and
fumed, or taken it out in grousing to his neighbors. But instead,
he put on his hat that night, walked into town meeting, and
blew off his steam in public.

As a result of that talk of indignation, the citizens of Clifton,
New Jersey, urged him to run for the town council. So for
weeks he went from one meeting to another, denouncing waste
and municipal extravagance.

There were ninety-six candidates in the field. When the
ballots were counted, lo, Godfrey Meyer’s name led all the rest.
Almost overnight, he became a public figure among the fort)'
thousand people in his communit)’. As a result of his talks, he

6 HOW to WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

made eighty times more friends in six weeks than he had been
able to do, previously in twenty-five years.

And his salary as councilman meant that he got a return, of'
one thousand per cent a year bn his investment.. ,

The third speaker, the head of a large national association of
food manufacturers, told how he had been unable to stand up
arid express his ideas at meetings of a board of directors.

, As a result of learning to think on his feet, two astonishirig .
things happened. He was soon made.presiderit of his associa-
tion and, in that capacity, he was obliged to address meetirigs
all over the United States. Excerpts from his talks were put on
the Associated’ Press wires and printed in newspapers and trade
fnagazines throughout the coubtty.

In two years, after learning to speak, he received more free
publicity for his company and its products than he had been
able to get previously by a quarter of a million dollars spent in
direct. advertising. This speaker admitted that he had forrnerly
hesitated to telephone some of the more important executives
in lower ’Manhattan and invite them to lunch with him. But
as a result of the prestige he had acquired by his talks, these
same men now telephoned him and invited him to lunch and
apologized to him for encroaching on his time.

The ability to speak is a short cut to distinction. It puts a man
in the limelight, raises him head and shoulders above the
crowd. And the man who can speak acceptably is usually given
credit for an ability out of all proportion to what he really
possesses.

A movement for adult education is sweeping over the nation
today; and the rnost spectacular force in that movement is Dale
Carnegie, a man who has listened to and criticized more talks
by adults than has any other man in captivity. According to a
recent cartoon by '‘Believe-It-or Not" Riplej’, he has criticized
150,000 speeches. If that grand total doesn’t impress you,
remember that it medns one talk for almost every day that has
passed since Columbus discovered America. Or, to, put it in
other words,, if all the men who have spoken before him had

A SHORT-CUT TO DISTINCTION

7

used only three minutes and had appeared before him in suc-
cession, it would have taken a solid year, listening day and
night, to hear thejn all.

Dale Carnegie’s own career, filled with sharp contrasts, is a
striking example of what a man can accomplish when he is
obsessed with an original idea and afire with enthusiasm.

Bom on a Missouri farm ten miles from a railway, he never
saw a street car until he was twelve years old; yet today, at
forty-six, he is familiar with the far-flung corners of the earth,
everywhere from Hong Kong to Hammerfest ; and, at one time,
he approached closer to the North Pole than Admiral Byrd's
headquarters at Little America were to the South Pole.

This Missouri lad who once picked strawberries and cut
cockleburrs for five cents an hour is now paid a dollar a minute
for training the executives of large corporations in the art of
self-expression.

This erstwhile cowboy who once punched cattle and branded
calves and rode fences out in western South Dakota later went
to London and put on shows under the patronage of His Royal
Highness, the Prince of Wales.

This chap who was a total failure the first half-dozen times
that he tried to speak in public later became my personal man-
ager. Much of my success has been due to training under Dale
Carnegie.

Young Carnegie had to struggle for an education, for hard
luck was always battering away at the old farm in northwest
Missouri with a flying tackle and a body slam. Year after year,
the "102” River rose and drowned the corn and swept away
,the hay. Season after season, the fat hogs sickened and died
from cholera, the bottom fell out of the market for cattle and
mules, and the bank threatened to foreclose the mortgage.

Sick with discouragement, the family sold out and bought
another farm near the State Teachers’ College at Warrensburg,
Missouri. Board and room could be had in town for a dollar a
day; but young Carnegie couldn’t afford it. So he stayed on the
farm and commuted on horseback three miles to college eacii

8 ... , ■ HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

day. At home, he milked the cows,' nit the wood, fed lie hogs,
and studied his Latin verbs by the h'ght of a coal-oil lamp until
bis eyes blurred and he began to nod.

Even when he got to bed at midnight, he set the alarm for
. three o’clock. His father bred pedigreed Duroc-Jefsey hogs —
and there was danger, ' during the bitter cold nights, -of lie
young pigs’ jFreezing.to death; so they were put,in.a. basket,

' covered with a gunny sack, and set behind the kitchen stove.
True to their nature, the pigs demanded a hot meal at three A.M;
So when the alarm went off, Dale Carnegie crawlefd out of the
blankets, took the basket of pi^ out to their mother, waited for
them to nurse, and then brought them back to. the warmth of.
the kitchen stove. . .

• There were six hundred students in State Teachers' College;
and Dale Carnegie was one of the isolated half dozen who
couldn’t afford to board in town. He was ashamed of the
. pover^ that made it necessary for hitn-to ride back to the farm
and milk the cows every night He was ashamed of his coat,
which was too tight, and his. trousers, which were too short.
Rapidly developing an inferiority complex, he looked about for
some short cut to distinction. He soon saw that there were
certain groups in college that enjoyed influence and prestige —
the football and baseball players and the chaps who won the
debating and public-speaking contests.

Realizing that he had no flair for athletics, he decided to win
one of the speaking contests. He spent months preparing his
talks.. He practiced as he sat in the saddle galloping to college
and back'; he practiced his speeches as he milked the cows;

, and then he mounted a bale of hay in the barn and with great
gusto and gestures harangued the frightened pigeons about the
necessity of halting Japanese immigration.

But in spite of all his earnestness and preparation, he met
with defeat after defeat. He was eighteen at the time — sensitive
, and proud. He became so discouraged, so depressed that he
e\'en thought of suicide. And then suddenly he began to win,
not one contest but every speaking contest in college.

A SHORT-CUT TO DISTINCTION

9

Other students pleaded with him to train them; and they
won also.

Graduating from college, he started selling correspondence
courses to the ranchers among the sand hills of western Ne-
braska and eastern Wyoming.

In spite of all his boundless energy and enthusiasm, he
couldn't make the grade. He became so discouraged that he
went to his hotel room in Alliance, Nebraska, in the middle
of the day, threw himself across the bed, and wept with despair.
He longed to go back to college, he longed to retreat from the
harsh battle of life ; but he couldn’t. So he resolved to go to
Omaha and get another job. He didn’t have the money for a
railroad ticket so he traveled on a freight train, feeding and
watering two carloads of wild horses in return for his passage.
Landing in South Omaha, he got a job selling bacon and soap
and lard for Armour and Company. His territory was up among
the Bad Lands and the cow and Indian country of western
South Dakota. He covered his territory by freight train and
on stage coach and on horseback and slept in pioneer hotels
where the only partition between the rooms was a sheet of
muslin. He studied books on salesmanship, rode bucking bron-
chos, played poker with s<5uaw men, and learned how to collect
money. When an inland storekeeper couldn’t pay cash for the
bacon and hams he had ordered, Dale Carnegie would take a
dozen pairs of shoes off his shelf, sell the shoes to the railroad
then, and forward the receipts to Armour and Company.

He would often ride a freight train a hundred miles a day.
When the train stopped to unload freight, he would dash
uptown, see three or four merchants, get his orders; and when
the whistle blew, he would dash down the street again licket)'-
split and swing onto the train while it was moving.

Within two years, he had taken an unproductive territory
that stood in the trs’enty-fifth place and boosted it to first place
among all the tv,’enty-nine car routes leading out of Soutli
Omaha. Armour and Company offered to promote him, saying;
"You have achieved what seemed impossible.’’ But he refused

lO HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

the promotion and resigned— reigned, went to. New York,
studied at the American Academy of Dramatic' Arts, and toured
the country jilaying the role of Dr. Hartley in 'Polly of the
Circus. . - ■ -

He would never be a Booth or a Barrymore. He had the good
sense to recognize that. So back he went to sales work again,
dispensing automobile trucks for the Packard Motor Car
Company. ‘ .

He knew ^nothing about machinery and cared nothing about
it. Dreadfully unhappy, he had to scourge himself to his task
each day. He longed to have time to study, to write the books
he had dreamed about writing back in college. So he resigned.
He was going to spend his days writing stories and novels and
support himself by teaching in a night school.

Teadiing what? As he looked back and evaluated his college
work, he saw that his training in public speaking had done
more to give him confidence, courage, poise, and the ability
to meet and deal with people in business than had alL’the rest
of his college courses put together. So he urged the Y. M. C. A.
schools in New York to give him a chance to conduct courses
in public speaking for business men.

What? Make orators out of business men? Absurd. They
knew. They had tried such courses — and they had always failed.

' When they refused to pay him a salary of two dollars a night,
he agreed to teach on a commission basis and take a percentage
of the net profits — if there were any profits to take. And inside
of three years they were paying him thirty dollars a night on
that basis; — instead of two.

The course grew. Other "Y’s” heard of it, then other cities.
Dale Carnegie soon became -a glorified circuit rider covering
New York, Philadelphia, Baltimore, and later London and
Paris. All the textbooks were too academic and impractical for
the business men who flocked to his courses. Nothing daunted,
he sat down and wrote one entitled Public Speaking and Influ-
encing Men in Business. It is now the official text of all the

A SHORT-CUT TO DISTINCTION

1 1

Y. M.'C. A.’s as well as the American Bankers’ Association and
the National Credit Men’s Association.

. Today far more adults come to Dale Carnegie for training
in public speaking each season than go to all the extension
courses in public speaking conducted by all the twent}’-t^'o
colleges and universities located in New York City.

Dale Carnegie claims that any man can talk when he gets
mad. He says that if you hit the most ignorant man in town
on the jaw and knock him down, he will get on his feet and
talk with an eloquence, heat, and emphasis that would have
rivaled William Jennings Bryan in his palmiest days. He claims
that almost any man can speak acceptably in public if he has
self<onfidence and an idea that is boiling and stewing within
him.

The way to develop self-confidence, he says, is to do the
thing you fear to do and get a record of successful experiences
behind you. So he forces each man to talk at es’er}' session of
the course. The audience is sympathetic. They are all in the
■ same boat; and, by constant practice, they develop a courage,
confidence, and enthusiasm that carry over into their private
speaking.

^ Dale Carnegie will tell you that he has made a living all
these years, not by teaching public speaking — that has been in-
cidental. He claims his main job has been to help men conquer
their fears and develop courage.

He started out at first to conduct merely a course in public
speaking, but the students who came were business men. Many
of them hadn’t seen the inside of a classroom in thirt)’ years.
Most of them were paying their tuition on the installment plan.
They wanted results and they wanted them quick — results that
they could use the next day in business interanews and in
speaking before groups.

So he was forced to be swift and practical. Consequently, he
has developed a system of training that is unique — a striking
combination of public speaking, salesmanship, human rela-
tions, and applied psychology.

12

HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

,A slave to no hard and fast rules, he has developed a course
that is as real as the rheasles and twice as much. fun.

When the classes terminate, the rnen . form clubs of their
own and continue to mert fortnightly for years afterwards.
One group of nineteen men in Philadelphia has been meet-
ing twice a month during the winter season for seventeen
years. Men frequently motor fifty or a hundred miles to attend
these classes. One student used to commute each w’eek from
Chicago to New York. '

Professor WiUiam James of Harvard used to say that the
average, man develops only ten per cent of his latent mental
ability. Dale Carnegie, by helping business men and women to
develop their latent possibilities, has created one of the most
significant movements in' adult education.

HOW THIS BOOK WAS WRITTEN—
AND WHY

By Dale Carnegie

During the last thirty-five years, the publishing houses of
America have printed more than a fifth of a million different
books. Most of them were deadly dull; and many were finan-
cial failures. "Many," did I say? The president of one of the
largest publishing houses in the world recently confessed to
me that his company, after seventy-five years of publishing ex-
perience, still loses money on seven out of every eight books it
publishes.

Why, then, have I had the temerity to write another book?
And, after I have written it, why should you bother to read it?

Fair questions, both; and I'll' try to answer them.

In order to explain precisely how and why tin’s book was
written, I may, unfortunately, have to repeat briefly some of
the facts that you have already read in Lowell Thomas intro-
duction entitled "A Short Cut to Distinction."

I have, since 1912, been conducting educational courses for
business and professional men and women in New York. At
first, 1 conducted courses in public speaking only — courses de-
signed to train adults, by actual experience, to think on their
feet and express their ideas with more clarity, more effective-
ness, and more poise, botli in business interviews and before
groups.

But gradually, as the seasons passed, I realized that sorely as
these adults needed training in effective speaking, tlrey needed
still more training in the fine art of getting along with people
in every’day business and social contacts.

I also gradually realized that I was sorely in need of sudi
training myself. As I look back now across the years, I am

13

14 HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

appalled at my own frequent lade of finesse and understand-
ing. How I wish a book such as this had been placed m my
hands twenty years ago! What a priceless boon it would have
been! ' . .

Dealing with people is probably the biggest problem you
face, espedaUy if you are a business man. Yes, and that is also
true if you are a housewife, architect, or engineer. Research
made a few years ago under the auspices of the Carnegie Foun-
dation for the Advancement of Teachers uncovered a most
important and significant fact — a fact later confirmed by addi-
tional studies made at the Carnegie Institute of Technology.
These investigations revealed that even in such technical lines
as engineering, about 15 per cent of one’s financial success is
due to one's technical knowledge and about 85 per cent is due
to skill in human engineering — ^to personality and the ability
to lead people.

For many years, I conducted courses each season in the
Engineers' Club of Philadelphia, and also courses for the New
York Chapter of the American Institute of Electrical Engineers.
A total of probably more than 1,500 engineers have passed
through' my classes. They came to me because they finally real-
ized, after years of observation and experience, that the high-
est-paid men in the engineering field are frequently not the
men who know most about engineering. One can, for example, ’
hire mere technical ability in engineering, accountancy, archi-
terture, or any other profession at twenty-five to fifty dollars
a week. The market is always glutted with it. But the man who
has technical knowledge plus the ability to express his ideas,

to assume leadership, and to arouse enthusiasm among men

that man is headed for higher earning power.

In the heyday of his activity, John D. Rockefeller told Mat-
thew C. Brush that "the ability to deal with people is as pur-
chasable a commodity as sugar or coffee.’’ “And I will pay
more for that ability," said John D., "than for any other under
the sun."

Wouldn’t you suppose that every college in the land would

HOW THIS BOOK WAS WRITTEN — ^AND WHI'

15

conduct courses to develop the highest-priced ability under the
sun? But if there is just one practical, commonsense course of
that kind given for adults in even one college in the land, it
has escaped my attention up to the present writing.

, The University of Chicago and the United Y.M.C.A. Schools
conducted a survey to determine what adults really want to
study.

That survey cost $25,000 and took two years. The last part
of the survey was made in Meriden, Connecticut. It was taken
as a typical American town. Every adult in Meriden was inter-
viewed and requested to answer 156 questions — questions such
as "What is your business or profession? Your education? How
do you' spend your spare time? What is your income? Your
hobbies? Your ambitions? Your problems? What subjects arc
you most interested in studying?" And so on. That surs’cy re-
vealed that health is the prime interest of adults — and that
their second interest is people; how to understand and get
along with people; how to make people like you; and how to
win others to your way of thinking.

So the committee conducting this survey resolved to conduct
such a course for adults in Meriden. They searched diligently
for a practical textbook on the subject but found — not one.
Finally they approached one of the world’s outstanding author-
ities on adult education and asked him if be knew of any book
which met the needs of this group. "No,” he replied, "I know
what those adults want. But the book they need has never been
written.”

I knew from experience that this statement was true, for I
myself had been searching for years to discover a practical,
working handbook on human relations.

Since no such book existed, I have tried to write one for use
in my own courses. And here it is. I hope you like it.

In preparation for this book, I read everything that I could
find on the subject — everything from Dorothy Dix, the divorcc-
court records, and the 'Parentis Magazine, to Professor Over-
street. Alfred Adler, and William James. In addition to that.

10 . HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

I hired a trained research man to spend one and a half years
in. various libraries reading everything I had missed, plowing
through erudite tomes on psychology, poring over hundreds of
magazine articles, scarfing through countless biographies; try-
ing to ascertain how the great men of all ages had dealt with'
people. We read the biographies of the great men of all ages.
We read the hfe stories of all great leaders from Julius Caesar
to Thomas Edison. I recall that we read over one hundred
biographies of Theodore Roosevelt alone. We were determined
to spare no time, no expense, to discover every practical idea
that anyone had ever used throughout the ages to win friends
and influence people.

I personally interviewed scores of successful people, some of
them world-famous — Marconi, Franklin D. Roosevelt, Owen
D. Young, Clark Gable, Mary Pickford, Martin Johnson— and
tried to discover the technique they used in human relations.

From all this material, I prepared a short talk. I calkd it
"How to Win Friends and Influence People." I say "short.”
It was short in the beginning, but it has now expanded to a
lecture that consumes one hour and thirty minutes. For years,

I have given this talk each season to the adults in the Carnegie
Institute courses in New York.

'I gave the talk and urged them to go out and test it in their
business and social contacts, and then come back to class and
speak about their experiences and the results they had achieved,
’'^at an interesting assignment! These men and women, hun-
gry for self-improvement, were fascinated by the idea of work-
ing in a new kind of laboratory— the first and only laboratory
of hmnan relationshipsTor adults that has ever existed.

This book wasn’t written in' the usual sense of the word. It
grew as a child grows. It grew and developed out of that
laboratory, out of the e.xperiences of thousands of adults.

Years ago, we started with a set of rules printed on a card
no larger than a post card. The next season we printed a larger
card, then a leaflet, then a series of booklets, each one expand-

HOW THIS BOOK WAS WRITTEN — AND WHY

17

ing in size and scope. And now, after fifteen years of experi-
ment and research, comes this book.

The rules we have set down here are not mere theories or
guess work'. They work like magic. Incredible as it sounds, I
have seen the application of these principles Hterally revolu-
tionize the lives of many people.

To illustrate: Last season a man with 314 employees joined
one of these courses. For years, he had driven and criticized
and condemned his employees without stint or discretion.
Kindness, words of appreciation, and encouragement were alien
to his lips. After studying the principles discussed in this book,
this employer sharply altered his philosophy of life. His organ-
ization is now inspired with a new loyalty, a new enthusiasm, a
new spirit of team work. Three hundred and fourteen enemies
have been turned into three hundred and fourteen friends. As
he proudly said in a speech before the class: "When I used to
walk through my est^lishment, no one greeted me. My em-
ployees actually looked the other way when they saw me ap-
proaching. But now they are all my friends and even the janitor
calls me % my first name."

This employer now has more profit, more leisure, and — what
is infinitely more important — he finds far more happiness in
his business and in his home.

Countless numbers of salesmen have sharply increased their
sales by the use of these principles. Many have opened up new
accounts — accounts that they had formerly solicited in vain.
Executives have been given increased authority, increased pay.
One executive last season reported an increase in salary' of five
thousand a year largely because he applied these troths. An-
other, an executive in the Philadelphia Gas Works Company',
was slated for demotion because of his belligerence, because of
his inability to lead people skillfully. This training not only
saved him from a demotion when he was sixty'-five, but it
brought him promotion with increased pay.

On innumerable occasions, w'ives attending the banquet
given at the end of the course have told me that their homes

. iS . - HOW JO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

have been .much happier since their husbands took this train-
ing- . ' - '

- . Men 'are frequently astonished at the new , results ■ they
achieve.. It all seems like magic In some cases, in their en-
thusiasm, they have telephoned me at my home on Sundays
because they couldn’t wait forty^eight hours to report their
achievements at the regular session of the course.

One man was so stirred by. a talk on these principles last
^ason that he sat discussing them with the other members of
the class until far into the night. At three o'clock in the morn-
ing, the. others went home. But he was so shaken by a realiza-
tion of his own mistakes, so inspired by the vista of a, new
and richer world opening before him, that he was unable to
sleep. He. didn't sleep that night or the next day or the nrat
night.

Who was he.? A naive, untrained individual ready to gush
over any new theory that came along? No. Far from it. He is
a' sophisticated, blas^ dealer in art, very much , the man about'
town, who speaks three languages fluently and is a graduate of
two foreign universities.

While writing this chapter, I received a letter from a Ger-
man of the old school, an aristocrat whose forbears had served
for generations as professional army ofiicers under the Hohen-
zoUerns. His letter, written from a transatlantic steamer, telling
about the application of these principles, rose almost to a rcr
ligious fervor.

, Another man, an old New Yorker, a Harvard graduate,
whose name looms large in the Social Register, a wealthy man,
the owner of a large carpet factory, declared that he had
learned more in fourteen weeks through this system of train-
ing about the fine art of influendng people than he had learned
about the same subject during his four years in college. Absurd?
Laughable? Fantastic? Of course, you are' privileged to dismiss
this statement with whatever adjective you wish. I am merely,
reporting, without comment, a declaration made by a conserva-
tive and eminently successful Harvard graduate in a public

HOW THIS BOOK WAS WRITTEN AND WHY

19

address to approximately six hundred men at the Yale Club in
New York on the evening of Thursday, February 23, 1933.

"Compared to what we ought to be,” said the famous Pro-
. fessor William James of Harvard, "compared to what we ought
to be, we are only half awake. We are making use of only a
small part of our physical and mental resources. Stating the
thing broadly, the human individual thus lives far within his
limits. He possesses powers of various sorts which he habitu-
ally fails to use."

Those powers which you "habitually fail to use”! The sole
purpose of this book is to help you discover, develop, and
profit by those dormant and unused assets.

"Education,” said Dr. John G. Hibben, former President of
Princeton University, "education is the ability to meet life’s
situations.”

If by the time you have finished reading the first three chap-
ters of this book — if you aren’t then a little better equipped to
meet life’s situations, then I shall consider this book to be a
total failure, so far as you are concerned. For "the great aim of
education,” said Herbert Spencer, "is not knowledge but ac-
tion.”

And this is an action book.

This introduction, like most introductions, is already too
long. So let’s go. Let’s get down to brass tacks at once. Please
turn immediately to Chapter One.

PART ONE

. Fundamental Techniques
, IN Handling People

CHAPTER ONE
"if you want to gather honey, don’t

KICK OVER THE BEEHIVE”

On May 7, 193i, New York City witnessed the most sensa-
tional man-hunt the old town had ever known. After weeks of
search. "Two Gun” Crowley — the killer, the gunman who
didn’t smoke or drink^ — was at bay, trapped in his sweetheart's
apartment on West End Avenue.

One hundred and fifty policemen and detectives laid siege
to his top-floor hideaway. Chopping holes in the roof, they
tried to smoke out Crowley, the "cop killer,” with tear gas.
Then they mounted their machine guns on surrounding build-
ings, and for more than an hour one of New York’s fine resi-
dential sections reverberated with the crack of pistol fire and
the rat-tat-tat of machine gims, Crowley, crouching behind an
overstuffed chair, fired incessantly at the police. Ten thousand
excited people watched the battle. Nothing like it had ever
been seen before on the sidewalks of New York.

Whm Crowley was captured. Police Commissioner Mul-
roonej’ declared that the two-gun desperado was one of the;
most dangerous criminals ever encountered in the history of
New York. "He will kill,” said the Commissioner, "at the drop
of a feather.”

But how did "Two Gun” Crowley regard himself? We
know, because while the police were firing into his apartment,

I 20

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 21

he. wrote a letter addressed “To whom it may concern.” And,
as he wrote, the blood flowing from his wounds left a crimson
trail on the paper. In this letter Crowley said: "Under my coat
is a weary heart, but a kind one — one that would do nobody
any harm."

A short time before this, Crowley had been having a neck-
ing party on a country road out on Long Island. Suddenly a
policeman walked up to the parked car and said: "Let me see
your license,”

Without saying a word, Crowley drew his gun, and cut the
policeman down with a shower of lead. As the dying officer
fell Crowley leaped out of the car, grabbed the officer’s re-
volver, and fired another bullet into the prostrate body. And
that was the killer w'ho said: "Under my coat is a weary heart,
but a kind onfe — one that would do nobody any harm."

Crowley was sentenced to the electric chair. When he ar-
rived at the death house at Sing Sing, did he say, "This is what
I get for kilting people.^” No, he said: "This is what I get for
defending myself.”

The point of the story is this: "Two Gun" Crowley didn’t
blame himself for anything.

Is that an unusual attitude among criminals.^ If you think so,
listen to this;

"I have spent the best years of my life giving people the
lighter pleasures, helping them have a good time, and all I get
is abuse, the existence of a hunted man.”

That’s A1 Capone speaking. Yes, America's erstwhile Public
Enemy Number One — the most sinister ganglcader who ever
shot up Chicago. Capone didn’t condemn himself. He actually
regarded himself as a public benefactor — an unappreciated and
misunderstood public benefactor.

And so did Dutch Schultz before he crumpled up under
gangster bullets in Newark. Dutch Schultz, one of New York s
most notorious rats, said in a newspaper intcndew that he was
a public benefactor. And he believed it.

I have had some interesting correspondence witli Warden

22 ■ HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

Lawes’ of Sing Sing on this subject, and he declares that "few
of the criminals in Sing Sing regard themselves as bad men.
They are just as human as you and I. So they ra'tionalize, they
explain. They can tell you why they had to crack a safe or be
quick on the trigger finger. Most of them attemj^t by a form
of reasoning, fallacious or logical, to justify their- anti-social
acts even to themselves, consequently stoutly maintaining that
they should never have been imprisoned at all.”

If A1 Capone, "Two Gun” Crov/ley, Dutch Schultz, the
desperate men: behind prison walls don't blame themselves for
anything— w'hat about the people with whom you and I come
in contact?

The late John Wanamaker once confessed: "T learned
thirty years ago that it is foolish to scold. I have enough-
trouble overconiing my own limitations without fretting over
the fact that God has not seen fit to distribute evenly the gift
of intelligence.”

Wanamaker learned this lesson early; but I personally had
to blunder through this old w'orld for a third of a century
before it even began to dawn upon me that ninety-nine times
out of a hundred, no man ever criticizes himself for ainything,
no matter how wrong he may be.

Criticism is futile because it puts a man on the defensive,
and usually makes him strive to justify himself. Criticism is .
dangerous, because it w’ounds a man's precious pride, hurts his
sense of importance, and arouses his resentmeht.

'The German'army won’t let a soldier file a complaint and
make a criticism irnmediately after a thing has happened. He
-has to sleep on his grudge first and cool off. If he files his com-'
plaint immediately, he is punished. By the eternals, there ought
to be a law' like that in civil life too — a law for whining parents
and nagging. w'ives and scolding employers and the whole ob-
noxious parade of fault-finders.

You w'iU find examples of the futility of criticism bristling
on a thousand pages of history. Take, for exatnple, the famous
quarrel betw'een Theodore Roosevelt and. President Taft — a

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 23

quarrel that split the Republican Part}', put Woodrow Wilson
in the White House, and wrote bold, luminous lines across the
World War and altered the flow of history. Let’s review the
facts quickly: When Theodore Roosevelt stepped out of the
White House in 1908, he made Taft President, and then went
off to Africa to shoot lions. When he returned, he exploded.
He denounced Taft for his conserv’atism, tried to secure the
nomination for a third term himself, formed the Bull Moose
Party, and all but demolished the GOP. In the election that
followed, William Howard Taft and the Republican Party
carried only tu'O states — Vermont and Utah. The most dis-
astrous defeat the old party had ever known.

Theodore Roosevelt blamed Taft; but did President Taft
blame himself? Of course not. With tears in his eyes, Taft
said: "I don’t see how I could have done any differently from
what I have."

Who was to blame? Roosevelt or Taft? Frankly, I don’t
know, and I don't care. The point I am trying to make is that
all of 'Theodore Roosevelt's criticism didn’t persuade Taft that
he was wrong. It merely made Taft strive to justify himself
and to reiterate with tears in his eyes: ’’1 don’t see how I could
have done any differently from what I have.’’

Or, take the Teapot Dome Oil scandal. Remember it? It
kept the newspapers ringing with indignation for years. It
rocked the nation! Nothing like it had ever happened before
in American public life within the memoi}' of living men.
Here are the bare facts of the scandal: Albert Fall, Secretary
of the Interior in Harding’s cabinet, was entrusted with the
leasing of government oil reserves at Elk Hill and Teapot
Dome — oil reserves that had been set aside for the future use
of the Nav)'. Did Secretary Fall permit competitive bidding?
No sir. He handed the fat, juicy contract outright to' his friend,
Edward L. Doheny. And what did Doheny do? He gave Secre-
tary' Fall what he was pleased to call a ’’loan’’ of one hundred
thousand dollars. Then, in a high-handed manner. Secretary
Fall ordered United States Marines into the district to drive off

24 , . HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE. PEOPLE

competitors whose, adjacent wdls were; sapping oil out of the'
Elk Hill reserves. These competitors, driven off their ground
at the ends of guns and bayonets, rushed into court — and blew
the lid off the hundred million dollar Teapot Dome' scandal.
A stench arose so vile that it ruined the Harding administra- ,
tioii, nauseated an entire nation, threatened to wreck the Re-
publican .Party, and put Albert B. Fall behind prison bars.

Fall, was coridemned viciously — condemned as few men in
public life have ever been. Did he repent? .Never! Years later
Herbert Hoover intimated in a public, speech that President
Harding’s death had been due to mental anxiety and worry
because a friend had betrayed him. When Mrs. Fall heard that,-
she sprang from her chair, she wept, she shook her fists at
fate, and screamed: "What! Harding betrayed by Fall? No! My
husband never betrayed anyone. This whole house full of gold .
would not tempt my husband to do wrong. He is the one who
has been betrayed and led to the slaughter and crucified;”

There you are: human nature in action, the wrong-doer ’
blaming everybody but himself. We are all like that. So when
you and Tare tempted to criticize someone tomorrow, let’s re-
member A1 Capone, "Two Gun” Crowley, and Albert Fall.
.Let’s .realize that criticisms are like homing pigeons. They' al-
ways return home. Let’s realize that the person we are going
to correct and condemn will probably justify himself, and con-
demn us. in return; or, like the gentle Taft, he will say: "I ,
don't see how I could have done any differently from what I
have.”

On Saturday morning, April 15, 1865, Abraham Lincoln lay
dying in a hall bedroom of a cheap lodging house directly
across the street from . Ford's TTieatre, where Booth had shot
him. Lincoln's long body lay- stretched diagonally across a
sagging bed that was too short for him. A cheap reproduction
of Rosa Bonheur's famous painting, '"The Horse Fair,” hung
above the bed, and a dismal gas jet -flickered yellow light.

As Lincoln lay dying. Secretary of War Stanton said, '"There

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 25

lies the most perfect ruler of men that the ■world has ever
seen.”

What, was the secret of Lincoln’s success in dealing with
men.^ I studied the life of Abraham Lincoln for ten 5 'ears, and
devoted all of three years to writing and rewriting a book en-
titled Li7uol>i the U nknotim . I beliei’e I have made as detailed
and exhaustive a study of Lincoln's personality and home life
as it is possible for any human being to make. I made a special
study of Lincoln’s method of dealing with men. Did he in-
dulge in criticism? Ohj yes. As a young man in the Pigeon
Creek Valley of Indiana, he not only criticized but he wrote
letters and poems ridiculing people and dropped these letters
on the country roads where they were sure to be found. One
of these letters aroused resentments that burned for a lifetime.

Even after Lincoln had become a practicing lawyer in Spring-
field, Illinois, he attacked his opponents openly in letters pub-
lished in the newspapers. But he did this just once tcx) often.

In the autumn of 1842, he ridiculed a vain, pugnacious
Irish politician by the name of James Shields. Lincoln lam-
pooned him through an anonymous letter published in the
Springfield fournal. The town roared with laughter. Shields,
sensitive and proud, boiled with indignation. He found out
who wrote the letter, leaped on his horse, started after Lincoln,
and challenged him to fight a duel. Lincoln didn’t want to
fight. He was opposed to dueling; but he couldn't get out of
it and save his honor. He was given the choice of weapons.
Since he had vety’^ long arms, he chose cavalry broad swords,
took lessons in sword fighting from a West Point graduate;
and, on the appointed day, he and Shields met on a sand bar
in the Mississippi River, prepared to fight to the death; but,
at the last minute, their seconds interrupted and stopped the
duel.

t

That w'as the most lurid personal incident in Lincoln’s life.
It taught him an invaluable lesson in the art of dealing with
people. Never again did he ■write an insulting letter. Never

26 HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND influence PEOPLE.

again did he ridicule anyone. And from that time on,- he almost
never criticized anybody for. anything.

Time after time, during the Civil War, Lincoln put a new
general at the head of the Army of the Potomac, ahd each one
in turn— McQellan, Pope, Burnside, Hooker, Meade — blun-
dered tragically, and drove Lincoln to pacing the floor in
despair Half the nation savagely condemned these incom-
petent generals, but Lincoln, "with malice towards none,, with
charity for all,” held his peace. One of his favorite quotations
was "Judge not, that ye be not judged.” .

And when Mrs. Lincoln and others spoke harshly of the
Southern people, Lincoln replied: "Don't criticize them; they
are just w'hat we would be under similar circumstances.” -
Yet, if any man ever had occasion to criticize, surely . it
was Lincoln. Let's take just one illustration:

The Battle of Gettysburg was fought during the first three
days of July, 1863. During the night of July 4, Lee began to
retreat southward while storm clouds deluged the country with
rain. ^5^en Lee reached the Potomac with his defeated army,
he found a swollen, impassable river in front of him, and a
victorious. Union army behind him. Lee was in a trap. He
couldn’t escape. Lincoln saw that. Here was a golden, heaven-
sent opportunity — the opportunity to capture Lee’s army and
end the war immediately. So, with a surge of high hope, Lin-
coln ordered Meade not to call a council of war but to attack
Lee immediately. Lincoln telegraphed his orders and then sent
a special messenger to .Meade demanding immediate action.

And what did General Meade do? He did the very opposite
of what he was told to do. He called a council of war in direct
violation of Lincoln’s orders. He hesitated. He procrastinated.
He telegraphed all manner of excuses. He refused point blank
to attack Lee. Finally the waters receded and Lee escaped over
the Potomac with his forces.

Lincoln was furious. "What does this mean?” Lincoln cried
to his son Robert. "Great Godl What does this mean? We had
them within -our grasp, and had only to stretch forth our hands

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 27

and they were ours; yet nothing that I could say or do could
make the army move. Under the circumstances, almost any
general could have defeated Lee. If I had gone up there, I
could have whipped him myself."

In bitter disappointment, Lincoln sat down and wrote Meade
this letter. And remember, at this period of his life he was
extremely conservative and restrained in his phraseolog}'. So
this letter coming from Lincoln in 1863 was tantamount to the
severest rebuke,

■'My dear General,

"I do not believe you appreciate the magnitude of the mis-
fortune involved in Lee's escape. He was within our easy
grasp, and to have closed upon him would, in connection with
our other late successes, have ended the war. As it is, the war
will be prolonged indefinitely. If you could not safely attack
Lee last Monday, how can you possibly do so south of the
river, when you can take with you very few — no more than
two-thirds of the force you then had in hand.^ It would be
unreasonable to expect and I do not expect that you can now
effect much. Your golden opportunity is gone, and I am dis-
tressed immeasurably because of it.”

What do you suppose Meade did when he read that letter?

Meade never saw that letter. Lincoln nes’er mailed it. It
was found among Lincoln's papers after his death.

My guess is — and this is only a guess — that after writing
that letter, Lincoln looked out of the window and said to
himself, "Just a minute. Maybe I ought not to be so hasty. It
is easy enough for me to sit here in the quiet of the White
House and order Meade to attack; but if I had been up at
Gettysburg, and if I had seen as much blood as Meade has
seen during the last week, and if my ears had been pierced
with the screams and shrieks of the wounded and dying, maybe
I wouldn’t be so anxious to attack either. If I had Meade s
timid temperament, perhaps I would have done just what he

28- , HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND.INFLUENCE PEOPLE

has done. Anyhow, it is water under the bridge now. If I ; send
this letter, it will relieve my feelings but it will make Meade
try to Justify himsdf. It will make him condemn me. It will
arouse hard feelings, impair all. his further usefulness as a
commander, and perhaps force him to resign from the army.”

So, as I have already said, Lincoln put the letter aside, for ,
he had Jeamed by bitter experience that sharp criticisms and .
rebukes almost invariably end in futility.

Theodore Roosevelt said that when he, as President, was .
confronted by some perplexing problem, he used to lean back
and look up at a large painting of Lincoln that himg above his
desk in the White House and ask himself, "What would Lin-
coln do if he were in my shoes? How would he solve this
problem?”

The next time we are tempted to give somebody "hail Co-- •
lumbia,” let's pull a five-dollar bill out of our pocket, look at
Lincoln’s picture on the biU, and ask, "How would Lincoln
handle this problem if he had it?”

Do you know someone you would like to change and regu-
late and improve? Good! That is fine. I am all in favor of it. .
But why not begin on yourself? From a purely selfish stand-
point, that is a lot more profitable than trying to improve
others — yes, and a lot less dangerous.

"When a man's fight begins within himself,” said Brown-
ing, "he is worth something.” It will probably take, from now
until Christmas to perfect yourself. You can then have a nice
long rest over the holidays and devote the New Year to reg-
ulating and criticizing other people. '

But perfect yourself first.

"Don’t complain about the snow on your neighbor’s roof,”
said Confucius, "when your own doorstep is unclean.”

When I was still young and trying hard to impress people,.

I wrote a foolish letter to Richard Harding Davis, an author
who once loomed large, on the literary horizon of America. L
was preparing a magaaine article about authors; and I asked

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 2g

Davis to tell me about his method of work. A few weeks
earlier, I had received a letter from someone with this nota-
tion at the bottom: "Dictated but not read.” I was quite im-
pressed. I felt the writer must be very big and busy and
important. I wasn’t the slightest bit busy; but I was eager
to make an impression on Richard Harding Davis so I ended
my short note with the words: "Dictated but not read."

He never troubled to answer the letter. He simply returned
it to me with this scribbled across the bottom: "Your bad
manners are exceeded only by your bad manners.” True, I had
blundered, and perhaps I desers’ed his rebuke. But, being
human, I resented it. I resented it so sharply that when 1 read
of the death of Richard Harding Davis ten years later, the one
thought that still persisted in my mind — and I am ashamed
to admit — was the hurt be had given me.

If you and I want to stir up a resentment tomorrow that
may rankle across the decades and endure until death, just let
us indulge in a little stinging criticism — no matter how certain
we are that it is justified.

When dealing with people, let us remember we are not
dealing witli creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures
of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated
by pride and vanity.

And criticism is a dangerous spark — a spark that is liable
to cause an explosion in the powder magazine of pride — an
explosion that sometimes hastens death. For example. General
Leonard Wood was criticized and not allowed to go witli the
army to France. That blow to his pride probably shortened his
life.

Bitter criticism caused the sensitive Thomas Hardy, one of
the finest novelists that ever enriched English literature, to
give up the writing of fiction forever. Criticism drove Thomas
Chatterton, the English poet, to suicide.

Benjamin Franklin, tactless in his youth, became so diplo-
matic, so adroit at handling people that he was made American
Ambassador to France, The secret of his success? "I will speak

30 , - ■ HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

ill of no man,” he said, . . and speak all the good, I know
of everybody,” . , '

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain — and most
fools do.

But it takes character and self-control to be understanding
and forgiving. . .

"A great man shows his greatness,” said Carlyle, "by the
way he treats little men.”

Instead of condemning people, let’s try to understand them.
Let’s try to figure out why they do what they do. That’s a lot
more profitable and intriguing than criticisrri; and it breeds
sympathy, tolerance, and kindness. "To know all is to forgive
all.”

■ As Dr. Johnson said: "God Himself, sir, does not propose
to judge man until the end of his days.”

Why should you and I?

CHAPTER TWO

THE BIG SECRET OF DEALING WITH PEOPLE

There is only, one way under high Heaven to get , anybody
to do anything. Did you ever stop to think of that.^ Yes,' just
one way. And that is by making the other person want to do it.

, Remember, there is no other way.

Of course, you can make a man w'ant to give you his watch
by sticking a xevolver in his ribs. You can make an employee
give you co-operation — until your back is turned — by threaten-
ing to fire him. You can make a child do what you want it to
do by a whip or a threat. But these crude methods have sharply
undesirable repercussions.

The only w'ay I can get you to do anything is by giving .you
what you want.

fundamental techniques in handling people 31
, What do you want?

The famous Dr. Sigmund Freud of Vienna, one of the most
distinguished psychologists of the twentieth century, says that
everything you and I do springs from tu^o motives: the sex
urge and the desire to be great.

Professor John Dewey, America's most profound philoso-
pher, phrases it a bit differently. Dr. Dewey says the deepest
urge in human nature is "the desire to be important.” Remem-
ber that phrase: "the desire to be important." It is significant.
You are going to hear a lot about it in this book.

What do you want? Not many things, but the few things
that you do wish, you crave with an insistence that will not
be denied. Almost every normal adult wants —

1. Health and the preservation of life.

2. Food.

3. Sleep.

4. Money and the things money will buy.

5. Life in the hereafter.

6. Sexual gratification.

7. The well-being of our children.

8. A feeling of importance.

Almost all these wants are gratified — all except one. But
there is one longing almost as deep, almost as imperious, as
the desire for food or sleep which is seldom gratified. It is
what Freud calls "the desire to be great.” It is what Dcwc)'
calls the "desire to be important.”

Lincoln once began a letter by saying: "Everjhody likes a
compliment.” William James said: "The deepest principle in
human nature is the craving to be appreciated.” He didn't
speak, mind you, of the 'wish” or the "desire" or the "long-
ing” to be appreciated. He said the "craving’ to be appre-
ciated.

Here is a gnawing and unfaltering human hunger; and the
rate individual who honestlv satisfies this heart-hunger will

32 HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

hold people in the palm of his hand and "even the undertaker
will he sorry when he dies.”

The desire for a feeling of importance is one of the chief
distinguishing differences between mankind and the animals.
To illustrate: When I was a farm boy out in Missouri, my
father bred fine Duroc-Jersey hogs and pedigreed white-faced
cattle. We used to exhibit our hogs and white-faced cattle at
the county fairs and livestock shows throughout the Middle
West. We won first prizes by the score. My father pinned his
blue ribbons on a sheet of. white muslin, and when friends or
visitors came to the house, he would get out the long sheet of
muslin. He would hold one end and I would hold the other
while he exhibited the blue ribbons.

The hogs didn’t care about the ribbons they had won. But
Father did. These prizes gave him a feeling of importance.

If our ancestors hadn’t had this flaming urge for a feeling
of importance, civilization would have been impossible. With-
out it, we should have been just about like the animals.

It was this desire for a feeling of importance that led aii
uneducated, poverty-stricken grocery clerk to study some law
books that he found in the bottom of a barrel of household
plunder that he had bought for fifty cents. You have probably
heard of this grocery clerk. His name Was Lincoln.

It was this desire for a feeling of importance that inspired
Dickens to write his immortal novels. ’lliis desire inspired Sir
Christopher Wren to design his symphonies in stone. This
desire made Rockefeller amass millions that he never spent!.
And this same desire made the richest man in your town build
a house far too large for his requirements.

'This desire makes you want to wear the latest styles, drive
the latest car, and talk about your brilliant children.

It is this: desire which lures many boys into becoming
gangsters and gunmen. '”rhe average young criminal of today,”
says E. P. Mulrooney, former Police Commissioner of New
York, ' "is filled with ego, and his first request after arrest is
for those lurid nev'spapers that make him out a hero. 'The dis-

FUNDAitENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 33

agreeable prospect of taking a 'hot squat’ in the electric chair
seems remote, so long as he can gloat over his likeness sharing
space with pictures of Babe Ruth, LaGuardia, Einstein, Lind-
bergh, Toscanini, or Roosevelt.”

If you tell me how you get your feeling of importance, I’ll
tell you what you are. That determines your character. That is
the most significant thing about you. For example, John D.
Rockefeller gets his feeling of importance by giving monev to
erect a modern hospital in Peking, Qiina, to care for miU-ons
of poor people whom he has never seen and ner’er will see.
Dillinger, on the other hand, got his feeling of importance by
being a bandit, a bank robber and killer. When the G-men
were hunting him, he dashed into a farmhouse up in Minnesota
and said, *Tm Dillinger!” He was proud of the fact that he was
Public Enemy Number One. 'Tm not going to hurt you, but
I'm Dillinger!” he said.

Yes, the one significant difference between Dillinger and
Rockefeller is how they got their feeling of importance.

History sparkles with amusing examples of famous people
struggling for a feeling of importance. Even George Wash ng-
ton wanted to be called "His Mightiness, the President of tlic
United States” ; and Columbus pleaded for the title, ''Admir.1l
of the Ocean and Viceroy of India." Catherine the Great
refused to open letters that were not addressed to "Her Im-
perial Majesty” ; and Mrs, Lincoln, in the White House, turned
upon Mrs. Grant like a tigress and shouted, "How dare you be
seated in my presence until I invite you!”

Our millionaires helped finance Admiral Byrd’s exped tion
to the Antartic with the understanding that ranges of icy'
mountains w’ould be named after them; and Victor Hugo
spired to have nothing less than the city of Paris renamed in
his honor. Even Shakespeare, mightiest of the mighty, tried to
add luster to his name by procuring a coat of arms for his
family.

People sometimes become invalids in order to win symp.ithy
and attention, and get a feeling of importance. For c-xamplc.

34 HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

take Mrs. McKinley. She got a feeling of importance by. forcing
her husband, the President of the United States, to neglect im-
portant affairs of state while he reclined on the bed beside her
for hours at a time, his arm about her, soothing her to sleep.
She fed her gnawing desire for attention by insisting that he
remain with her while she was having her teeth fixed; and
once created a stormy scene when he had to leave her alone
with the dentist while he kept an appointment with John Hay.

Mary Roberts -Rinehart once told me of a bright, vigorous
. young woman who became an invalid, in order to get a feeling
of importance. "One day,” said Mrs. Rinehart, "this woman
had bden obliged to face something, her age perhaps, and the
fact that she would never be married. The lonely years were
stretching ahead and there was little left for her to anticipate.

"She took to her bed; and for ten years her old mother
traveled to the third floor and back, carrying trays, nursing her.
Then one day the old mother, weary with service, lay down and
died. For some weeks, the invalid languished ; then she got up,
put on her clothing and resumed living again.”

- Some authorities declare that people may actually go insane
in order to find, in the dreamland of insanity, the feeling of
importance that has been denied them in the harsh world of
reality. There are more patients suffering from mental diseases
in the hospitals in the United States than from all other diseases
combined. If you are over fifteen years of age and residing in
New York State, the chances are one out of. twenty that you
will be confined to an insane asylum for seven years of your
life.

What is the cause of insanity?

Nobody can answer such a sweeping question as that, but we
know that certain diseases, such as syphilis, break down and
destroy the brain cells and result in insanity. In fact, about one-
half of all. mental diseases can be attributed to such physical
causes as brain lesions, alcohol, toxins, and injuries! But the
other half — and this is the appaUine part of the storv — the

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 35

Other half of the people who go insane apparently have
nothing organically wrong with their brain cells. In post-
mortem examinations, when their brain tissues are studied
under the highest-powered microscopes, they are found to be
apparently just as healthy as yours and mine.

Why do these people go insane.^

I recently put that question to the head physician of one of
our most important hospitals for the insane. This doctor, who
has received the highest honors and the most coveted awards
for his knowledge of insanity', told me frankly that he didn't
know why people went insane. Nobody knows for sure. But he
did say that many people who go insane find in insanity- a feel-
ing of importance that they were unable to achies-e in the world
of reality. Then he told me this story;

"I have a patient right now whose marriage proved to be a
tragedy. She wanted love, sexual gratification, children, and

■ social prestige; but life blasted all her hopes. Her husband
didn’t love her. He refused even to eat with her, and forced her
to ser\'e his meals in his room upstairs. She had no children, no
social standing. She went insane; and, in her imagination, she
divorced her husband and resumed her maiden name. She now
believes she has married into the English aristocracy, and she
insists on being called Lady Smith.

"And as for children, she imagines now that she has a new-
child every night. Each time I call on her she says; 'Doctor, 1
had a baby last night.' ’’

Life once wrecked all her dream ships on the sharp rocks of
reality; but in the sunny, fantastic isles of insanity, all her
barkentines race into port w-ith canvas billowing and with winds
singing through the masts.

Tragic.^ Oh, I don’t know. Her physician said to me; "If I

■ could stretch out my hand and restore her sanity-, I wouldn't do
it. She’s much happier as she is.”

As a group, insane people are happier than you and I. Many
enjoy being insane. Why shouldn’t they-.^ They have solved
their problems. They- will w-rite you a check for a million

36 HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

dollars, or give you a letter of introduction, to. the Aga Khan.
They have found in a dream world of their own creation the
feeling of importance which they so deeply desired. -

If some people are so hungry for a feeling of importance
that they actually go insane, to get it, imagine what miracles
you and I can achieve by giving people, honest appreciation
this side of insanity.

There have been, so far as I know, only two people in history
who were paid a salary' of a. million dollars a year: Walter
Chrysler and Charles Schwab.

Why did Andrew Carnegie pay Schwab a -million dollars a
year or more than three thousand dollars a day? Why?

Because Schwab is a genius? No. Because he knew more
about the manufacture of steel than other people? Nonsense.
Charles Schwab told me himself that he had many men work-
ing for. him who knew more about the manufacture of steel
than he did.

Schwab says that he was paid this salary largely because of
his ability to deal with people. I asked’him how he did it.
Here is his secret set down in his own words — ^words that
ought to be cast in eternal bronze and hung in every home and
school, every shop and office in the land — words that children
ought to memorize instead of wasting their time memorizing
the conjugation of Latin verbs or the amount of the annual
rainfall in Brazil — words that will all but transform your life
and mine if we will only live them:

, "I consider my abilHy to arouse enthusiasm among the men,”
said Schwab, ’’the greatest asset. I possess, and the- way to
develop the best that is in a man is by appreciation and en-
couragement.

''There is nothing else that so kills the ambitions of a man
as criticisms from his superiors. 1 never criticize anyone. I
believe in giving a man incentive to work. So I am anxious to
praise but loath to find fault. If 1 like anything, I atn hearty in
my approbation and lavish in my praise.”

That is w'hat Schwab does. But what does the average man

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 37

do? The exact opposite. If he doesn’t like a thing, he raises the
Old Harry ; if he does like it, he says nothing.

"In my wide association in life, meeting with many and great
men in various parts of the world,” Schwab declared "I have
yet to find the man, however great or exalted his station, who
did not do better work and put forth greater effort under a
spirit of approval than he w'ould ever do under a spirit of
criticism.”

That he said, frankly, was one of the outstanding reasons for
the phenomenal success of Andrew Carnegie, Carnegie praised
his associates publicly as W’ell as privately.

Carnegie wanted to praise his assistants even on his tomb-
stone. He wrote an epitaph for himself which read; "Here
lies one who knew how to get around him men who were
cleverer than himself.”

Sincere appreciation was one of the secrets of Rockefeller’s
success in handling men. For example, when one of liis part-
ners, Edward T. Bedford, pulled a boner and lost the firm a
million dollars by a bad buy in South America, John D. might
have criticized; but he knew Bedford had done his best — and
the incident was closed. So Rockefeller found something to
praise; he congratulated Bedford because he had been able to
save sixty per cent of the money he had invested. "That's
splendid,” said Rockefeller. "We don’t always do as well as
that upstairs.”

Ziegfeld, the most spectacular eniTepreiienr who c-ver
dazzled Broadway, gained his reputation by his subtle ability
to "glorify the American girl.” He repeatedly took some drab
little creature that no one es'er looked at tw’ice and transformed
her on the stage into a glamorous vision of mystery and
seduction. Knowing the value of appreciation and confidence,
he made w'omen feel beautiful by the sheer power of his
gallantry and consideration. He was practical: he raised the
salary' of chorus girls from thirty’ dollars a week to as high as
one hundred and seventy-five. And he was also chivalrous: on

38 HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE'

Opening night at the Follies, he sent a telegram to the stars in
the cast, and he deluged every chorus girh in the show with
American Beauty roses.

r.once succumbed to the fad of fasting and went.for "six days
and nights'without eating. It wasn’t difficult. I was less hungry
at the end of the sixth day than I was at the end of the second.
Yet I know, and you know, people who would. think they had
committed a crime if they let their families or employees go for
six days without food; but they will let them go for six days,
and six weeks, and sometimes sixty years without giving them .
the hearty, appreciation that they crave almost as much as they
crave food.

When Alfred Lunt played the stellar role in Reunion in
Vienna, he said, "There is nothing I need so much as nourish-
ment for my self-esteem.”

We nourish the bodies of our children and friends and
employees; but how seldom do we nourish their, self-esteem.
We provide them with roast beef and potatoes to build energy ;
but we neglect to give them kind words of appreciation that
would sing in their raemo'ries for years like the music of the
morning stars. . .

- Some readers are saying right now as they read these lines:
".Old Stuff! Soft soap! Bear oil! Flattery! I've tried that stuff.
It doesn’t work — not with intelligent people.”

Of course, flattery seldom w'orks with discerning people. It
is shallow, selfish, and insincere. It ought to fail and it
usually does. True, some people are so hungry, so thirsty, for
appreciation that they will swallow anything, just as a starving
man will eat grass and fish worms.

Why, for example, were the much-married Mdivani brothers,
such flaming successes in the matrimonial market? Why were
these so-called "Princes” able to marry two beautiful and
famous screen stars and a world-famous prima donna and
"Barbara Hutton with her five-and-ten-cent-store millions? Wliy?
How did they . do it?

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 39

"The 'Mdlvani charm for -women,” said Adela Rogers St.
John,, in an article in the magazine Liberty, "... has been
among the mysteries of the ages to many.

"Pola Negri, a woman of the world, a connoisseur of men,
and a great artist, once explained it to me. She said, 'They
understand the art of flattery as do no other men I have e%’er
met. And the art of flattery is almost a lost one in this realistic
and humorous age. That, I assure you, is the secret of the
Mdivani charm for women, I know.’ ”

Even Queen Victoria was susceptible to flattery. Disraeli con-
fessed that he put it on thick in dealing with the Queen. To
use his exact words, he said he "spread it on with a trowel.”
But Disraeli was one of the most polished, deft, and adroit men
who ever ruled the far-flung British Empire. He was a genius in
his line; What would work for him wouldn't necessarily work
for you and me. In the long run, flattery will do you more
harm than good. Flattery is counterfeit, and like counterfeit
money, it will eventually get you into trouble if you try to pass
it.

The difference between appreciation and flattery’? That is
simple. One is sincere and the other insincere. One comes from
the heart out; the other from the teeth out. One is unselfish;
the other selfish. One is universally admired ; the other is uni-
versally condemned.

I recently saw a bust of General Obregon in the Chapultepcc
palace in Mexico City. Below the bust are catv'ed tliese wise
words from General Obregon's philosophy; "Don’t be afraid
of the enemies who attack you. Be afraid of the friends who
flatter you."

No! No! No! I am not suggesting flattery! Far from it. I'm
talking about a new way of life. Let me repeat. 1 am talking
about a neu> way of life.

King George V had a set of six maxims displayed on the
walls of his study at Buckingham Palace. One of these maxims
said: "Teach me neither to proffer nor receive cheap praise.
That’s ^1 flattery' is; cheap praise. I once read a definition of

40 , HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPEE

flattery that; may be worth repeating: “Flattery is telling the
other man prrasely what he thinks about himself.”' ■'

“Use what language you will,” said Ralph Waldo Emerson,
"you can never say anything but what you are." ■

If all , we had to do was to. use flattery, everybody would
catch on to it and we should all be experts in human relations.

When we are not engaged in thinking about some definite
problem, we usually spend about 95 per cent of our. time
thinking about ourselves. Now, if we stop thinking about, our-
selves for awhile and begin to think of the other man’s good
points, we won’t have to resort to flattery so. cheap and false
that it can be spotted almost before it is out of the mouth.

Emerson said: "Ever}’ man I meet is my superior in some
way. In that, I learn of him.”

If that was true of Emerson, isn’t it likely to be a thousand
times more true of you and me? Let’s cease thinking of our
accomplishments, our wants. Let’s try to figure out the other
man’s good points. Then forget flattery. Give honest, sincere
appreciation. Be "hearty in your approbation arid lavish in
your praise,” and people will cherish your words and treasure
them and repeat them over a lifetime— repeat them years after
you have forgotten them.

CHAPTER THREE

"he who can do this has the whole world
WITH him. he who cannot WALKS

A LONELY WAY.”

I GO FISHING up in Maine every summer. PersonaUy I. am very
fond of strawberries and cream; but I find that for some
strange reason fish prefer worms. So when I go fishing, I
don’t think about what I want. I think about what they want

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 4 1

I don’t bait the hook -with strawberries and cream. Rather, I
dangle a worm or a grasshopper in front of the fish and say;
"Wouldn’t you like to have that?”

Why not use the same common sense when fishing for men.^

That is what Lloyd George did. When someone asked him
how he managed to stay in power after all the other war-time
leaders — Wilson, Orlarido, and Clemenceau — had been ousted
and forgotten, he replied that if his staying on top might be
attributed to any one thing, it was probably to the fact that he
had learned it was necessary to bait the hook to suit the fish.

Why talk about what we want? That is childish. Absurd. Of
course, you are interested in what you want. You are eternally
interested in it. But no one else is. 'The rest of us are just like
you: we are interested in what we want.

So the only way on earth to influence the other fellow is to
talk-about what he wants and show him how to get it.

- Remember that tomorrow when you are trying to get some-
body to do something. If, for e,xamp]e, you don’t want your
son to smoke, don’t preach at him, and don’t talk about what
you want; but show him that cigarettes may keep him from
making the baseball team or winning the hundred-yard dash.

This is a good thing to remember regardless of whether you
are dealing with children or calves or chimpanzees. For c.";-
ample: Ralph Waldo Emerson and his son one day tried to get
a calf into the bam. But they made the common mist.akc of
thinking only of what they wanted; Emerson pushed and his
son pulled. But the calf did just what they did; he thought only
of what he wanted; so he stiffened his legs and stubbornly
refused to leave the pasture. The Irish housemaid saw their pre-
dicament. She couldn’t write essays and books; but, on this
occasion at least, she had more horse sense, or calf sense, than
Emerson had. She thought of what the calf wanted ; so she put
her maternal finger in the calf’s mouth, and let the calf suck
her finger as she gently led him into the barn.

Every act you ever performed since the day you were bom i.<
because you wanted something. How about the time you gave

42 • HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE'

a hundred dollars to the Red Cross? Yes, that is no exception
to the rule. You gave the Red Cross a hundred dollars because '
you wanted tojend a helping hahd, because you wanted to do
a beautiful, unselfish, divine act. "Inasmuch as ye have done
it unfo one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it
unto me.”

If you hadn’t wanted that feeling more than you wanted your
hundred dollars, you would not have made . the contribution..
Of course, you may have made the contribution because ygu
were asiiamed to refuse or because a customer asked you to do.
itrBut-.onejhing is certain. You made the contribution because
you wanted something.

Professor Harry A. Overstreet in his fRumfnating book,-
Influeudng Human Behavior, says: "Action springs out of what
we fundamentally desire . . . and the best piece of advice
which can be given to would-be persuaders, whether in busi-
ness, in the home, in the school, in poh'tics, is: first, aro'use in
the other person an eager want. He who can do this has the
whole world with him. He who cannot walks a lonely w’ay!”

Andrew Carnegie, the poverty-stricken Scotch lad who.
started .to work at two cents an hour and finally gave away
three hundred and sixty-five million dollars — he learned early
in life that the only way to influence people is to talk in terms
of what the other person wants. He attended school only four
years, yet he learned how' to handle people. .

-To illustrate: His sister-in-law was worried sick over her two
boys. 'They were at Yale, and they w'ere so busy with their own
afi^airs that they neglected to write home and paid no attention
whatever to their mother's frantic letters.

Then Carnegie offered to w'ager a hundred dollars that he
could get an answ'er by return mail, without even asking for it.
Someone called his bet ; so he wrote his nephews a chatty letter,
mentioning casually in a postcript that he was sending each one
a five-doUar bill.

He neglected, however, to enclose the money. .

Back came replies by return mail thanking "Dear Uncle

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 43

Andrew” for his kind note and — ^you can finish the sentence
yourself.

Tomorrow you will want to persuade somebody to do
something. Before you speak, pause and ask: "How can I make
him want to do it?”

That question will stop us from rushing in heedlessly to see
people with futile chatter about our desires.

I rent the grand ballroom of a certain New' York hotel for
tw'enty nights in each season in order to hold a series of lectures.

At the beginning of one season, I was suddenly informed
that I should have to pay atoost three times as much rent as
formerly. This news reached me after the tickets had been
printed and distributed and all announcements had been made.

Naturally, I didn’t want to pay the increase, but what w'as
the use of talking to the hotel about w'hat I wanted? They were
interested only in what they w'anted. So a couple of days later
I went in to see the manager.

"I w'as a bit shocked when I got your letter,” I said, "but I
don't blame you at all. If I had been in your position, I should
probably have written a similar letter myself. Your duty as the
manager of this hotel is to make all the profit possible. If you
don’t do that, you will be fired and you ought to be fired. Now,
let’s take a piece of paper and w'rite down the advantages and
the disadvantages that will accrue to you, if you insist on this
increase in rent.”

Then I took a letterhead and ran a line through the center
and headed one column "Advantages” and the other column
"Disadvantages.”

I w'rote down under the head of "Advantages” these words:
"Ballroom free.” Then I w'ent on to say: "You wdll have the
advantage of having the ballroom free to rent for dances and
conventions. That is a big advantage, for affairs like that will
pay you much more than you can get for a scries of lectures. If
1 tie your ballroom up for twenty nights during the course of

44

HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

the season, it is sure to mean a loss of some ye^ profitable
business to you.

"Now, let’s consider the disadvantages. First, instead of
increasing your income from me, you are going to decrease it.
In fact, you are going to wipe it out because I cannot pay the
rent you are asking. I shall be forced to hold these lectures at
some other place.

"There’s another disadvantage to you also. 'These -lectures
attract crowds of educated and cultured people to your hotel.
That is good advertising for you, isn’t it.? In fact, if you spent
$5,000 advertising in the newspapers, you couldn’t bring as
many people to look at your hotel as I can bring by these
lectures. That is worth a lot to a hotel, isn’t it?”

As 1 talked, I wrote these tw'o "disadvantages” under the
proper heading, and handed the sheet of paper to the manager,
saying: "I wish you would carefully consider both the ad-
vantages and disadvantages that are going to accrue to you
and then give me your final decision.”

I received a letter the next day, informing me that my rent
would be increased only 50 per cent instead of 300 per cent.

Mind you, I got this reduction without saying a word about
what I wanted. I talked all the time about what the other person
wanted, and how he could get it.

Suppose I had done the human, natural thing: suppose I
had stormed into his office and said, "What do you mean by
raising my rent 300 per cent when you know the tickets have
been printed and the announcements made.? Three hundred per
cent! Ridiculous! Absurd! I won’t pay it!”

What would have happened then.? An argument would
have’ begun to steam and boil and sputter — and you know how
arguments end. Even if I had convinced him that he was
wrong, his pride would have made it difficult for him to back
down and give in.

Here is one of the best bits of advice ever given about the
fine art of human relationships. "If there is any one secret of
success,” , said Henry Ford, "it lies in the ability to get the

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE

45

other person’s point of view and see things from his angle as
well as from your own.”

That is so good, I want to repeat it: "If there is any one
secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person's
point of view and see things from his angle as well as from
your own.”

"That is so simple, so obvious, that anyone ought to see the
truth of it at a glance; yet 90 per cent of the people on this
earth ignore it 90 per cent of the time.

An example? Look at the letters that come across your desk
tomorrow morning, and you will find that most of them
violate this high canon of common sense. Take this one, a
letter written by the head of the radio department of an ad-
vertising agency with ofiices scattered across the continent. This
letter was sent to the managers of local radio stations through-
out the country. (I have set down, in parentheses, my reactions
to each paragraph.)

"Mr. John Blank,

BlankvHle,

Indiana.

Dear Mr. Blank:

The company desires to retain its position in adver-

tising agency leadership in the radio field.”

(Who cares what your company desires? I am worried
about my own problems. The bank is foreclosing the
mortgage on my house, the bugs are destroying the holly-
hocks, the stock market tumbled yesterday, I missed the
8:15 this morning, I wasn’t invited to the Jones’ dance
last night, the doctor tells me I have high blood pressure
and neuritis and dandruff. And then what happens? 1
come down to the office this morning worried, open my
mail, and here is some little whippersnapper off in New
York yapping about what his company wants. Bah! If he

46 HOW TO WIN" FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

only realized what sort of impression his letter makes, he
would get out of the advertising business and start thanu-
facturing sheep dip.)

"This agency’s national advertising accounts were the bul-
wark of the first network. Our subsequent clearances of station
time have kept us at the top of agencies year after year.”

(You are big and rich and right at the top, are you? So
what? I don’t give two whoops in Hades if you are as big
as General Motors and General Electric and the General
Staff of the U. S. Army all combined. If you had as much
sense as a half-witted humming bird, you would realize
that I am interested in how big 7 am — not how big you
are. Ail this talk about your enormous success makes me
- feel small and unimportant.)

"We desire to service our accounts with the last- word on
radio station information.”

(You desire! You desire. You unmitigated ass. I’m not
interested in what you desire or what Mussolini desires,
or what Bing Crosby desires. Let me tell you once and for
all that I am interested in what 1 desire — and you haven’t
said a word about that yet in this absurd letter of yours.)

"Will you, therefore, put the company on your pre-

ferred list for weekly station iiiformalion — every single detail
that will be useful to an agency in intelligently booking time.”

("Preferred list.” You have your nerve! You make me
feel insignificant by your big talk about your company — ^
and- then you ask me to put you on a "preferred” list,
and you don’t even say "please” when you ask it.)

"A prompt acknowledgment of this letter, giving us your
latest 'domgs,’ will be mutually helpful.”

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 47

(You fool! You mail me a cheap multigraphed letter
— a form letter scattered far and wide like the autumn
leaves ; and you have the gall to ask me when I am worried
about the mortgage and the hollyhocks and my blood pres-
sure, to sit down and dictate a personal note acknowledg-
ing your multigraphed form letter — and you ask me to do
it ' 'promptly." \^at do you mean, "promptly"? Don’t
you know I am just as busy as you are — or, at least, I like
to think I am. And while we are on that subject, who gave
you the lordly right to order me around? . . .You say it
will be "mutually helpful." At last, at last, you have be-
gun to see my viewpoint. But you arc vague about how it
will be to my advantage.)

Very trnly yours,

John Blank

Manager Radio Department

"P. S. The enclosed reprint from the Blankville Journal
will be of interest to you and you may want to broadcast it
over your station."

(Finally, down here in the postcript, you mention some-
thing that may help me solve one of my problems, '^^thy
didn’t you begin your letter with — but what's the use?
Any advertising man who is guilty of perpetrating such
drivel as you have sent me has something wrong with his
medulla oblongata. You don't need a letter giving our
latest doings. What you need is a quart of iodine in your
thyroid gland.)

Now if a man who devotes his life to advertising and who
poses as an expert in the art of influencing people to buy — if
he writes a letter like that, what can we expect from the
butcher and baker and carpet-tack maker?

Here is another letter, written by the superintendent of a

48 HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE .

large freight terminal to a student of this course, Mr. Edward
Verraylen. What effect did this letter have on the man to whom
it was addressed? Read it and then I’ll tell you.

A. Zerega’s Sons, Inc., ' ,

28 Front Street,

Brooklyn, N. Y.

Attention: Mr. Edward Vermylen

Gentlemen:

The operations at our outbound-rail -receiving station are
handicapped because a material percentage of the total business
is delivered us in the late afternoon. This condition results in
congestion, overtime on the part of our forces, delays to trucks,
and in some cases delays to freight. On November 10, we re-
ceived from your company a lot of 510 pieces, which reached
here at 4:20 P. M.

We solicit your co-operation toward overcoming the unde-
sirable effects -arising from the late receipt of freight. May we
ask that, on days on which you ship the volume which was
received on the above date, effort be made either to get the
truck here earlier or to deliver us part of the freight during the
forenoon?

The advantage that would accrue to you under such an
arrangement would be that of more expeditious discharge of-
your trucks and the assurance that your business would go For-
ward on the date of its receipt.

Very truly yours,

J & , Supt.

After reading this letter, Mr. Vermylen, sales manager for
A. Zierega’s Sons, Inc, sent it to me with the following com-
ment: "This letter had the reverse effect from that which was
intended^ The letter begins by describing the Terminal’s diffi-
culties, in which we are not interested, generally speaking. Our
co-operation is :then requested without any thought as to
whether it would inconvenience us, and then, finally, in the

FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 49

last paragraph, the fact is mentioned that if we do co-operate it
will mean more expeditious discharge of our trucks with the
assurance that our freight will go for«'ard on the date of its
receipt.

"In other words, that in which we are most interested is
mentioned last and the whole effect is one of raising a spirit of
antagonism rather than of co-operation.”

Let's see if we can’t rewrite and improve this letter. Let's not
waste any time talking about our problems. As Henry Ford
admonishes, let’s "get the other person’s point of view and see
things from his angle as well as from our own.”

Here is one way of refusing it. It may not be the best way;
but isn’t it an improvement?

Mr. Edward Vermylen,
c/o A. Zierega’s Sons, Inc.,

28 Front Street,

Brooklyn, N. Y.

Dear Mr. Vermylen:

Your company has been one of our good customers for
fourteen years. Naturally, we are very grateful for your patron-
age and are eager to give you the speedy, efiBcient service you
deserve. However, we regret to say that it isn’t possible for us
to do that when your trucks bring us a large shipment late in
the afternoon, as they did on November 10, Why? Because
many other customers make late afternoon deliveries also.
TSfaturally, that causes congestion. ’That means your trucks
are held up unavoidably at the pier and sometimes even your
freight is delayed.

That’s bad. Very bad. How can it be avoided? By making
your deliveries at the pier in the forenoon when possible. ’Tliat
will enable your trucks to keep moving, your freight will get
immediate attention, and our workmen will get home early at
night to enjoy a dinner of the delicious macaroni and noodles
that you manufacture.

30 HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE

Please don’t take this as a complaint, and please don’t feel-
I am assuming to tell you how. to run your business. This letter
is prompted solely by a desire to serve you more effectively.

Regardless of when your shipments "arrive, we shall, always
cheerfully do all in our power ta serve you promptly.

You are busy. Please don’t trouble to answer this note. .

Yours truly, , ,

J: B , Supt.

Thousands of salesmen are pounding the pavements today,
tired, discouraged, and underpaid. Why? Because they are
always thinking only of what they want. They don’t realize
that neither you nor I want to buy anything. If we did, we
would go out and buy it. But both of us are eternally in-
terested in solving our problems. And if a salesman can show
us how his services or his merchandise will help us solve our
problems, he won’t need to sell us. We'll buy. And a customer
likes to feel that he is buying — not being sold.

Yet many men spend a lifetime in selling without seeing
things from the customer’s angle. For example, I live in Forest
Hills, a little community of private homes in the center of.
greater New York. One day as I was rushing to the station, I
chanced to meet a real estate operator who had bought and sold
property on Long Island for many years. He knew Forest Hills
well so I hurriedly asked him .whether or not my stucco house
was built with metal lath or hollow tile. He said he didn’t
know and told me what I already knew: that I could find qiit
by calling the Forest Hills Gardens Association. 'The following
morning, I received a letter from him. Did he give me the in-
formation I wanted? He could have gotten it in sixty seconds
by a telephone call. But he didn’t. He told me again that I
could get it by telephoning myself, and then asked me to let"
him handle my insurance.

He was not interested in hfelping me. He was interested only
in helping himself.

•UNDAJ>1ENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE 5 !

I ought to have given him copies of Vash Young's excellent
ittle books, The Go-Giver znA A Fortune to Share. If he read
:hose books and practiced their philosophy, they would make
nim a thousand times as much profit as handling my insurance.

Professional men make the same mistake. Several